


OMARI

by after9yearsindevelopment



Category: OMORI (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Sad, Stairs, different protagonist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 13:07:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29350917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/after9yearsindevelopment/pseuds/after9yearsindevelopment
Summary: Mari had been pushing Sunny to perfection for so long, the last push was a deadly one.
Comments: 51
Kudos: 261





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> i liked an idea so i wrote it
> 
> thank you to omoricord for teaching me how to be good at writing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> literally just the beginning you goober

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note to self dont write stuff at 2 am or else when someone proofreads it, it looks like shit

It was late in the afternoon as Mari began to practice her recital. There were only a few days before the big recital, and she must not drop a single beat. It was failure in her eyes. As she began to play, a cracking noise was heard like someone dropped an egg. She was curious, and decided to leave the practice for later. Mari saw a sight she never wanted to see. Sunny's violin was at the bottom of the stairs, the owner not reacting at all. 

"What did you do?" Mari said, stomping up the stairs. Sunny would not react. "Why would you destroy your violin? Your FRIENDS worked for that!"

"I-"

"Don't even talk. The recital is so soon, yet you decide to do this? Why?" 

Mari was like the bad cop in an interrogation. Asking Sunny so many questions at once, his face went from emotionless to the verge of tears. She didn't stop.

"You spent so much time practicing, yet you decide to throw it away? Why would you do it?"

 **"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"** Sunny shouted, pushing her away. Mari was furious. Sunny was acting like he didn't throw away their chance of impressing their family. And now pushing HER away from helping HIM? She was blinded with anger as she shoved Sunny back. After realizing what she had done, it was too late. Sunny was already falling down the stairs.

He hit his head on the railing as he began to tumble. Step after step, he rolled down the stairs like a loose tire truck on the road.

"SUNNY!" Mari had called out, trying to save him. But she was paralyzed. All she could do was watch as Sunny plummeted down the staircase. He kept ricocheting off the walls like a rubber ball, about to reach the bottom. Mari tried to move again, still paralyzed from what she was watching. 

Sunny hit the bottom with a "SMACK!", landing right on his broken violin. Mari silently screamed as she ran down the steps. **"PLEASE!"** she yelled. She checked her brother's body, putting her head next to his heart, hoping to hear something, or anything at all.

Still beating. Yet she heard it slowing down. Mari didn't know what to do. What would her parents and friends do to HER if they found out that she had almost killed her brother? What would happen to her future? It was all so sudden to her that she acted brashly. She swept up the violin pieces, throwing them in the toy chest without any further thought, locking it. Afterwards, she ran towards the family phone.

"Hello? What seems to be the problem?"

"I saw my brother passed out at the bottom of the stairs bleeding out, please come quick!"

And then she hung up. Mari went back to their room, anxiously pacing around. What would happen if Sunny DID die? What if her lie didn't work out? How would this affect Kel, Aubrey, everyone that liked Sunny? She felt so many emotions at once she was becoming a nervous wreck. 

She began crying while sitting against the wall, trying to make sense of the situation. Mari felt like she heard Sunny's voice calling her "hated" and a "fraud" while the event played over and over in her head. Failure, failure, failure. The last of her composure began to fall to the sounds of sirens getting closer and closer.

What happened next felt like a blur to her. The entering of the house, her parents finally waking up and seeing what had happened, the shouts of orders and crying digging into her ears like a parasite, it was too much for her to try and remember. All she had last heard of Sunny was her parents calling for her to tell them what happened. Mari so badly wanted to tell the truth, yet she couldn't. She was at the mercy of whatever gods were up there, controlling the fate of Sunny. She was sent to bed as they didn't want her to see what happened next. Mari didn't want to either. 

As she went to bed, she saw something in the corner of her eye. It looked like an IV drip, supplying a humanoid monster with it's contents. Mari didn't want to look at it any further, turning around. But it followed. It felt like it was coming closer and closer. She closed her eyes tightly as the creaking of the floor began filling the room. Before she felt it get any closer, she finally fell asleep.

White. That was all she could see. She looked up and down, white. Getting up from her spot she woke up in, Mari looked around. There were a few things like their cat MEWO, a container of things like yarn, an open, blank book, and a basket. Surrounding her small collection of belongings, Mari saw a hanging light bulb with no clear power source, stairs that seemed to circle down endlessly, and a big, white door. Mari, despite her concerns, decided to walk down the stairs. Once she had taken the first step, there was no going back. A black hand started bolting up the stairs at her. She had wanted to run, yet she felt like her legs were glued to the floor. Bracing for an impact, she closed her eyes. She wanted to be out of this nightmare.


	2. Checking In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mari checks in on the group

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn 
> 
> also thank you gen3king for teaching me how to write good angst

She woke up. Mari didn't understand what had happened in her dream. Nor did she understand anything that had happened last night. She had so many questions, but before she could try answering them a newspaper was slipped under her room. She heard sobbing and crying near the door before it slowly got quieter, followed by a door shutting. She got out of bed to see what had slipped under the door. She opened the paper.

"Local boy dies in ambulance after supposed suicide attempt" was the first thing she had read. Nothing to cushion the blow. She read further. 

"JUNE 27, 1997; A 12 year old boy has died in an ambulance after a supposed suicide attempt. Authorities say that a call was made, most likely by a family member about the boy lying unresponsive on the ground, bleeding out. After authorities entered the home and picked up the boy, he later died of his wounds while in the ambulance. The family says that they had no clue what had happened, and could only pray for the boy while he was gone. From the evidence found, investigators have seemed to figure out the cause of death, jumping from the stairs onto a sharp object.” 

Mari couldn’t believe it. Sunny was dead. By her _own hands._ How could she have done this? It was _unforgivable._ She began to cry. Sitting down in the middle of the room, tears began to stain the newspaper like raindrops. Mari wanted to just rip up the newspaper. put it in the trash, and go back to crying into her pillow. But she kept reading it. Over and over again, the image of Sunny tumbling down the stairs onto the broken violin. Him bleeding out. Her hiding any sort of proof that it was her who caused it. Why couldn’t she have just admitted to it? _Why? Why? Why?_

The story engulfed her mind even more to the point that it felt like she was at the scene of the crime. Having to watch on repeat Sunny’s murder and her cleanup. It felt like Hell to Mari, so much that the only way to calm down was to try and forget. Yet that was impossible for her. 

Voices started filling the empty void. 

“ _This is YOUR fault, Mari.”_

_“You will never be forgiven.”_

_“Sunny will never be here again.”_

_“ They_ **_hate_ ** _you.”_

It was too much for Mari to handle as the voices kept repeating over and over again. Failure. It was _your_ fault. Nobody will forgive you. The only thing that calmed her down was when Mewo walked in the room. Her breakdown was finally soothed after Mewo got close to her and cuddled her. Yet it wasn’t the solution to everything like she had hoped. 

After Mewo had left, she got back into bed and stared at the ceiling. It was loneliness she had never wanted or hoped for. Looking to her right, she saw Sunny’s empty bed. Sunny should’ve been there, snoozing the day away as Mari smiled at him. Now, that wouldn’t happen anymore. All she would see was an empty bed, getting up with nobody to smile for. She stopped looking before it made her even more depressed. Looking at the blank ceiling, it felt like it was staring back. It peered inside of her, reading every part of her soul, finding the sins of her past and present. Mari had decided to try checking up on the rest of her friends. She got out of bed, yet couldn’t shake the feeling something was watching her. Noting her every step.

Mari went outside of her house and began making her way towards her friend, Aubrey. She definitely knew that Aubrey would be impacted the hardest, yet she could only guess how much before Mari saw her.

She knocked on Aubrey’s home door and waited for a response. Eventually, someone would finally speak from inside the house.  
“Hello, this is Aubrey’s dad, do you need anything?” he asked.  
“I’d like to talk with Aubrey for a bit, please.” Mari had responded, hoping to cheer her up.

“She might need some company.” her dad said, the only other person in the house. “She’s pretty down today.” Mari walked in as the door opened and went straight to Aubrey’s room. She knocked.

No response. She knocked again, saying her name. “Aubrey? Are you ok? It’s me, Mari.” It took a bit of time, but the door opened. Aubrey’s shattered emotions were immediately evident on her tear-stained face. Mari entered the room as the door was closed and locked.

Tears immediately burst out of Aubrey’s eyes after Mari had entered. She had also seen the news from a strewn newspaper near her house. 

“S-S-Sunny is d-dead!” Aubrey stammered, barely managing to spit out a word before bursting into tears once more. “H-h-he’s gone..” Mari began tearing up as well, though for alternate reasons. She had to remember once more of the event that was her confrontation with Sunny last night. 

“I-I feel like something has just evaporated from my life. S-Sunny was my closest f-friend! W-what will I do now?” she said, quivering. Mari felt like it was impossible to try to respond. Anything she would say might come off as brash or like she was trying to make Aubrey forget about someone so close to them.

“I need to learn that as well.” Mari had started, trying to clear her tears. “I miss him already and it feels like only a few hours since I read the news. H-He was the best brother I could’ve ever had, and i-it feels like it's impossible to move on without him.” Her attempts at keeping her tears away had only resulted in tears pouring down her face.

“Mari… W-what will happen? I don’t want to lose you too!” Aubrey said, beginning to cling to her. Tears began staining her clothes.

“I-I don't know, Aubrey. I don’t want to make you worry.” she replied, beginning to think of all the scenarios that could happen. 

She could stay here and be here with Aubrey and the rest, still being friends while not admitting the truth. She could also move away, never admitting the truth, and stay with the guilt for the rest of her days. There was also admitting the truth, but she didnt want to take her chances. After taking a chance once before and it resulting in a news article, a random chance would not be what she wanted. Mari snapped out of her indecision after Aubrey hugged her tighter.

“I never want to lose y-you…” Aubrey said, going further into her sadness. Those words made Mari tense up. She had heard them before, from her mother. Mari remembered vividly the words she had said when Sunny was taken away. “I don’t want to lose someone else.. Please Mari.. Please.” 

The words made her stronger and gave her something to live for. The sense of never wanting to give up for Aubrey, Kel, her friends, or anyone. She couldn’t just give up and keel over from Sunny’s death. She has to grieve, she knows, yet also knows that giving up wouldn’t make Sunny happy after all her pushes for perfection. Mari had to do it for _him_.

“Aubrey, I promise you with all my heart. I will never abandon you. I can’t lose another friend”. Mari had spoken with more truth in her words than ever before, deciding to hug Aubrey tighter than ever. Aubrey hugged back.  
“R-really? You promise?” Aubrey said, tears still flooding from her eyes. 

“Yes. I promise.” Mari had responded. She had to. For him.

As Mari got up, Aubrey saw something. In the corner of her vision, it was something akin to a humanoid sludge. “M-Mari?” Aubrey said, shocked at the sight.

“Yes?” Mari responded, confused. 

“I saw-I-” Aubrey stammered a bit before finally making a cohesive sentence.  
“There was s-something behind you…”

Mari was more creeped out from the comment and looked behind her. Nothing. Yet she felt like Aubrey was right.

“Well, see you later.” Mari said, making her way out of the house. She left and began making her way to Kel and Hero’s house. As she walked, they couldn’t shake off the feeling that something, or someone was watching her. She turned around, and saw **it**. The monster.

If she hadn’t been able to run fast before, she sure as well did now. Sprinting down the sidewalk, she kept trying to escape it. Yet every time she looked back, it managed to get **closer** . And **closer** . And **closer.** No matter what Mari did, it would never go away. She finally managed to get to the house, and knocked on the door in urgency. Looking around in panic, it had finally disappeared.   
  


The door had opened. It was Hero, currently crying like his tears were part of a rainstorm. Kel was nowhere to be seen, yet she could hear the cries of him from downstairs. Hero sat down along with Mari to talk.

“I-it just all felt so sudden! I couldn’t believe my eyes!” Hero said, trying to pull back his tears when he talked. “B-believing what I was reading was just-was just-” before Hero could continue, he began to cry. Mari began to hug Hero to try and cheer him up, but Hero was still trying to make sense of everything that had happened.

Mari decided to make the same promise to Hero as she did to Aubrey. 

  
“H-Hero?” Mari said, trying to calm down both Hero and herself, trying her best to put on a smile for him. “I’ll try my best to be there for you, even if nobody else will. It seems dark, but that's just a part of living.”

After hearing the small monologue Mari had given, Hero had somehow felt a tiny amount better. He was still crying and grieving over the loss of Sunny, but he somehow knew everything would be OK. Everything will be OK.

Mari got up, ready to leave. Suddenly, Hero’s expression changed from sad, yet hopeful to complete  _ horror.  _

“There was s-something behind you…” Hero had said to Mari, in a croaky tone. She looked around again. Nothing. Mari said goodbye to Hero before leaving, in a more questionable tone than usual. As the walk to Basil’s house began though, IT appeared again.

It was yet again a downhill battle as the monster began slowly making its way to Mari. If it was anything like the things she saw being read by Sunny, she didn’t want to mess with it. 

As she got to the door to Basil’s house and looked around, it had once again disappeared. A relief, for now. She knocked on the door and started waiting.

Eventually, Polly had finally answered the door and opened.  
“Is Basil here?” Mari had asked.

“Yes, but…. I think he wants to be alone today. Give him a few days.” Polly responded, having tears in her eyes. The door had closed on her. It was getting somewhat late, so she decided to waste some time in the park before going home. 

Taking a seat on a bench, she could finally relax. After checking-in on both Aubrey and Hero, she was emotionally drained. All she needed was some relaxation time to herself.

An hour had passed, and Mari felt emotionally refreshed. The calming tunes of the winds as well as the landscape in her vision had let her temporarily endure the sorrow from yesterday. It was her makeshift sanctuary to temporarily forget about the struggles she had to deal with. 

Mari got up from her bench and began to walk back home. The bench seemed to have changed something, as there was nothing in her psyche to damage her. No shadow monster trying to chase her, no thoughts of the murder of Sunny, the guilt, NOTHING. For a few minutes, Mari felt at ease. Nothing could dampen the mood she was currently in.   


Until she had gotten home.

Her parents weren’t there, yet she could hear everything they were saying. Arguing about Sunny. She never wanted to hear it happen. Yet, there it was, audible from the living room. Mari didn’t even want to do anything, going straight to her room. She found another sight; Sunny in his bed. She knew it was a fake. Something was messing with her.

Mari threw a small ball at the fake Sunny as it faded away. She must be hallucinating. The argument between her and Sunny started playing on repeat in her mind. Violins shattering the ground seemed to fill her room. Sunny’s voice calling Mari a “failure” and a “liar” to her friends. She tried to make her friends happy, yet Mari knew it was a futile attempt. Her empty words couldn’t win them over forever. 

**“You have empty words.”** **  
**

**  
“Nobody will forgive you.”**

**  
“You’d be better off dead.”**

**  
“You will never admit your faults.”**

**  
** **“The love people give to you is false.”**

**  
“He** **_hates_ ** **you.”**

  
  


Mari began delving into madness. The hallucinations, they felt REAL. The ear screeching noises of a broken violin as it stands on its last legs; the final screams of Sunny before he perished; sirens getting closer and closer, it was like the things causing her to go mad. She wanted them to stop, but they would not cease.

She slowly inched towards her bed, as they began to get louder. Now the sirens and broken violin melodically supported the last screams of Sunny, her vision beginning to fail as the one thing she could now see was Sunny plummeting down the stairs to his death. Mari was at her breaking point, yet still carried on. “For Sunny,” she thought. “I have to do it for him.”

As she was closer and closer to the bed, more and more hallucinations appeared. The cries of Kel, Aubrey, and Hero harmonized the blood curdling screams of Sunny and her parents. The body of Sunny was lying there peacefully on his bed, slowly rising as he stared at Mari, moving his head in a disapproving tone. All of this, and the things she wanted to promise but could never deliver, had finally taken its toll. She had silently screeched her voice out before passing out on the floor.


	3. Mari's Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari walks around White Space for a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok this may or may not be kinda short filler to get mari used to white space but trust me i'll try and make chapter 4 very good
> 
> uploaded at 3 am. this is what we call strats

Mari had woken up again. Looking around, she was back to the pure-white area from last night. 

Everything was the same as before. The mysterious light-bulb hanging from a string was still emitting it’s strong, black light. The white door had laid untouched and glistening. The stairs were still endlessly falling downwards to an unknown fate. Everything felt odd, yet Mari felt something she had wanted so bad. Calm.

She slowly got up and carefully made her way to the basket of yarn, watching her step to not fall into any hidden holes. Touching the ball of thick yarn, it felt.. real. Mari walked over and touched the blank book. Also real. The Mewo in the white room began walking up to Mari, rubbing on the side of her leg. The Mewo in the white room was _ real. _

She began to sit down on the floor, or whatever  _ is  _ the floor, and began to think as Mewo started to doze off on her leg. “What is this place? Why does this dream feel so real? Why does everything  _ feel _ real?” She had not wanted to think any further about this, still in shock of what she had felt.

Mari had considered going down the stairs to leave once again. This wasn’t good for her, indulging in a dream. Last time she did, she had gotten up late for a piano practicing session, which Mari was upset at. However, the horrors of the real world she had experienced not too long ago were taking a toll on her. The voices were finally gone, and she had this place to herself. Would she want to throw away her small amount of time at peace to go back? Mari pondered for a bit before coming to a conclusion. “Just a few minutes,” she said, beginning to grab yarn and a needle. “Nothing wrong with that.”

Hours seemed to pass as Mari began sinking deeper into the dream. She had seemed to start using all of the commodities of the white area, which she called “White Space”. First, Mari had created a blanket for Mewo and herself to relax on. Must’ve been better than the white void below, which she didn’t want to question what or even how it was there.

She decided next to try entering the door, seemingly being supported by nothing. Mari thought it was odd, yet her observations didn’t give any leads, only making her more confused. Taking a deep breath, she tried turning the doorknob. It was locked. She had a feeling of relief, as who knows what could be beyond that door. It was something she didn’t want to deal with yet.

The blank book was next. Flipping idly through the pages, she had considered the idea that something had existed in the book before she had entered. Picking up the book, she carried it over to the black light, trying to see if anything would happen. Nothing. She set it aside on the floor before retreating to the blanket with Mewo.

Mari began to think about the place she was in right now. A white area with nothing but silence and a few menial objects used to be like purgatory to her. Now, it felt like she was in heaven. The voices and hallucinations couldn’t penetrate the silence of White Space. Mari had begun to calm down as Mari started relaxing on the blanket she had made.

As she tried to doze off with Mewo cuddling in her arms, the black hands had suddenly appeared from the stairs, reaching out to grab Mari. Mari tried to run, but she couldn’t outrun the hands, who had managed to catch her. As the hands began dragging her towards the abyss of the endless stairs, Mari tried to call for help. Aubrey. Hero.  _ Anyone,  _ yet her calls were not answered. The endless silence of White Space deafened her cries as she was dragged down deeper and deeper into the abyss. Darkness seemed to envelop her as her sight went black.

Mari awoke to sirens blaring outside her window. 


	4. Home, Sweet Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mari has a dream then goes to basils house. cool stuff ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angst time

It couldn’t be happening to _her_ , right?

She got out of bed and ran towards the window, her eyes darting everywhere as she began to panic. Did someone know about her crime and tell the cops? Where was that siren coming from? Was this sound even… real? 

Her questions were answered a few seconds later. The cops were not called on her, which was a relief. However, an ambulance began chugging down the road as the siren began blasting in her ears. Before she could look at it any further, they retreated to the bed and began resting once more.

Mari opened her eyes once more. Instead of a pure white room like the last time, it was a field full of flowers that were surrounded by trees. She was in the middle of a forest. Ahead of her were Sunny and Basil, seemingly just standing there idly. “Sunny! Basil!” Mari exclaimed, beginning to run towards the duo. She had begun to try and hug the two. “I’m so glad you’re-” her words were stopped as the two faded into dust in her arms.

Flowers began to deteriorate around Mari as the surrounding areas slowly began to crumble into nothingness. Mari tried her best to save some, or any of the flowers before they had rot into nothingness. Yet the ones she tried to save crumbled in Mari’s hands like sand. Pieces of the ground near her began to fall as it was replaced by the endless void. She looked around as the last of the dream fell into the abyss. Mari began falling.

Falling....

  
  
  


_Falling…._

  
  
  


Mari woke up once more. Slowly getting up from her bed, she looked to her side. “Good morning-” her words were cut off as Mari realized that something was sitting there. It was… Sunny. Mari rubbed her eyes. Sunny was still there. 

“You-you can’t be real, right?” Mari asked, quivering.

“Oh, you fool. Of course I'm real!” the “Sunny” replied, beginning to smile at her. 

“D-do you still love me?” Mari asked, still eyeing “Sunny”.

“Haha, it's obvious!” they said, Sunny's face suddenly morphing into the IV drip monster. **“I HATE YOU.”** It lunged at her as Mari fell back off her bed, hitting her head on the nearby wall.. As she got up from the floor, rubbing the back of her head with her hands, it was gone.

Already on edge for the day, she was a lot more cautious while preparing for the day. As she left her room and went down the stairs, something seemingly grabbed her foot. Mari couldn’t even look before she began tumbling down the stairs. Step by step, Mari banged her head on each and every one. The violin was below her right as her vision went to black.

Mari snapped back to reality. Confused by what she saw, they looked around just to make sure. There was no violin at the bottom of the stairs, no hand on the steps, nothing. Cautiously, she went down the stairs, making sure to hold on the railing every step of the way. Mari didn’t even want to think of what would happen if she tried to make lunch, so she didn’t, putting on her shoes and leaving the house.

Her goal was dead-set, checking in on Basil. Mari had decided she wouldn’t look at the park, the trees, anything. She would only focus on walking towards Basil’s house. And, surprisingly, it worked! She didn’t experience anything odd or strange as Mari reached Basil’s house.

Oddly enough, the door to his house was unlocked, even with a sign that said Polly was out for the day. Mari was confused as to why. She was glad they got to the house first. Who knows what could’ve happened to him. He could’ve been robbed! “I wonder what Basil is doing with his door unlocked.” Mari thought. "I should see what's happening."

  
  


Mari gently opened the door.   
  


She saw Basil, holding his gardening shears. He was just standing there, pointing them at his abdomen. _And they were inching closer. And closer. And closer._

Mari screamed as she ran at Basil and tackled him to the ground, knocking the shears out of his hands. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?” she yelled, pinning him by his arms to the floor. Basil began stuttering as Mari became increasingly angry. Why was he doing something so reckless?

“I-I uhh… I uh-You don’t know what's going on-” Basil tried to nervously interrupt but Mari’s booming voice silenced him.

“What could’ve happened to you? To Polly? To ANY of us? _Why would you even try it?_ ” Mari couldn’t even fathom what would’ve happened if she had woken up any later. Basil would be lying here, shears in his stomach, bleeding out with nobody to save him. Basil began tearing up as Mari went from a tone of anger to a tone of sadness.

“I-I couldn’t lose you too. I don’t think anyone else could lose you too.” she said, beginning to cry. Tears dripped onto the floor as Basil seemed to become even more upset. He began kicking the air as he began to speak.

“W _hy?_ ” he began to ask Mari. “ _Why would he do it?_ ”

Mari froze. She… didn’t know herself. She began stuttering as she stalled for an answer. 

“W-well, I wouldn’t know myself. It was a-all so sudden-” 

“YOU’RE LYING!” he erupted, beginning to struggle once more. He continued. “Sunny always went over to my house and began crying about YOU being hard on him. It was always the days you practiced with him as well. He kept going ON and ON about him being almost verbally abused by you, spending hours or days on the same piece because YOU thought it wasn’t good enough, just like you thought of him. And now you lie to me about Sunny?”

Mari couldn’t respond. She had a blank face as tears began flowing through her eyes and onto Basil. Her grip began to loosen as she grabbed the shears and just… sat there near him. Dumbfounded that Sunny would just… never act like anything was wrong. It was a bullet to her mind that she was the one who started it. She could have saved him from the stairs, but not from herself. 

She was so distraught that she barely noticed Hero, Aubrey and Kel running inside to see what was happening. 

“What happened here?” Aubrey began to ask, running towards Basil, him still in tears. Kel began walking around the home as Hero began helping Mari up. Yet she was still blank-faced, beginning to realize who was here.

Basil remained silent as Mari finally began to notice what was going on and began to talk.

“I saw that the door was unlocked, so I decided to see what was happening. Then, I saw Basil here try to stab himself with the shears here!” Mari stated, holding up the shears. The three froze in place as they began looking at Basil.

“Basil? Are you ok?” Hero asked, beginning to stay near him as close as possible.

“N-no…” he responded, beginning to wipe his tears, his furious look hidden by his depressed mood. “Ever since Sunny died, it felt like I had nobody to talk to-” Mari heard this and began to rebut. 

“You had nobody to talk to? You had Polly, Aubrey, even me! How is that true then?” she responded, Hero’s look signaling that it wasn’t the time. She couldn’t observe it and went on.

“You’ve always bottled up your emotions like this, it isn’t fair to do this to any of us!” Basil began seething as Hero started looking angrily at Mari, and Aubrey took a few steps back near the doorway.

“OH YEAH? HOW ABOUT YOU EXPLAIN WHY YOU DROVE SUNNY TO KILL HIMSELF?” Basil angrily responded, everyone suddenly turning around to look at Mari. All eyes on her. She had wanted this for so long, yet it was not like how she imagined it.

Mari remained silent as Basil continued.

“Now you’re the silent one, are you? Sunny spent multiple months coming over and over to my home, my room, just to get away from YOU. The few times he’s ever spoken in his life was to ME, venting his frustrations about how you verbally abused him OVER and OVER for the smallest mistakes. He spent week after week after week working on the same song just because you thought “This note was a bit off pitch” or “It was a bit off sync.” You never even TRIED to listen to him, even after he looked for a chance so many times! He was **MY BEST FRIEND, MARI!** And now, **HE’S DEAD! YOU CAUSED THIS MARI! YOU CAUSED IT!”**

The room went silent. Kel’s joyful and carefree nature had halted, tears beginning to stream down his face. Aubrey’s brash yet soft nature turned into something as cold as stone. Hero’s usual role as being the equalizer of situations could never fix something like this. 

Basil and Mari began staring at each other. Basil's whole body shook in pure anger as he glared at Mari. Mari was like a ceramic statue. Unmoving and silent as tears began forming in her eyes, without a way to respond. The silence finally broke.  
  
"Mari?"

She began moving once more, this time out the door. “Wait!” Hero tried to talk her into staying, but she wouldn’t listen to a word, silently storming off. The walk home was just as quiet.

Mari reached her home and immediately went to her room after taking off her shoes. Despite it only being 11:35 AM, she was emotionally tired. In the span of 3 days, she accidentally killed Sunny and had Basil run his mouth about how Sunny died. Mari didn’t even need to see their faces to know that her friendships were cut in half. She locked the door as they began to try and sleep.

  
  


The hours seemed to pass as Mari tried to doze off. Despite only being awake for 30 minutes and it being in the middle of the day, she managed. The IV monster laid quietly in the dark corner of the room, waiting patiently.

  
  
  


**_Welcome to White Space._ **

Mari awoke in the same place she was in White Space before the hands caught her. The basket was still there. The door was still there. Mewo was still laying idly on the blanket. There was no Basil, no Sunny, nothing. It was just Mari in her own dream.

It was nice for today to finally be calm after what had happened a few minutes ago. She went back to her tried-and-true method of knitting objects out of yarn and relaxing with Mewo. 

She heard a knocking from the white door.

“Bini? Are you in there?” a familiar voice asked. Mari froze as she began staring at the door. “I know you’re in there, Sunny’s been worried sick about you!”

“W-who are you?” Mari asked, her fear beginning to rise up and out of her stomach. She slowly backed away to her blanket.

“Silly, it's me! Kel! C’mon, Sunny’s been scared of where you’ve been.” 

Mari knew that it wasn’t Kel. It was her dream, she knew that. Yet, her curiosity began to seep into her mind. _What could be beyond that door? What is using that voice? Could it really… be him?_

She got up from the blanket and began making their way to the door. As Mari put her hand close to the doorknob, it felt like memories began flooding her head. All the times she had angrily shouted at Sunny for every single mistake he made, it vividly formed in white space.

A sour note filled the room as Mari slammed the piano keys. “Not again, Sunny! It feels like we’ve practiced for so long and you STILL can’t hit the note!”

Sunny and Mari had been practicing for almost 6 months by now for the recital. It had been her main focus ever since they were told about it, and she brought Sunny along for the ride. It seemed like Sunny had been enjoying it, up until a few weeks ago.

It felt like Mari could finally see the social cues from Sunny after he died. He began nervously shaking every time they performed in front of their parents. Sunny started to stress as Mari began looking at him during the song, avidly waiting for him to mess up. The recital seemed to begin eating at his mind as well, him trying to throw away any sort of reminder for it.

“It’s like you are messing up on purpose, Sunny. That’s not how music works!” Mari’s head was in her hands as Sunny began looking at Mari, afraid. “I just want it to be perfect, just this once, Sunny and the fact that you don't have the decency to match my effort makes me—”

Mari let go of the doorknob before she could listen to the rest. She had always regretted that day. The way she treated Sunny, the music, her own decency, if anyone like Kel or Aubrey had seen that— she didn’t even want to think about it.

Cautiously, she tried putting her hand on the doorknob again. The same memory appeared. Mari tried her hardest to last through the memory, but she didn’t have enough willpower to get through. 

Mari tried retreating to her blanket to hide from all this guilt, which had not done anything to shield the memories. Practice sessions, one after another began flooding her brain with guilt and confusion. Was she that bad of a sister, that Sunny would destroy his violin?

Was she?

_  
__  
__  
_ _Was she?_

**_  
_****_  
_****_  
_****_  
_** **_  
_ _Was she?  
  
  
  
_**


	5. The Past and Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mari tries to calm down with piano and realizes something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> done

Mari woke up in a cold sweat, beginning to look around. The sun was just about to come out from the ground, beginning to illuminate the purple night sky. She began to calm down as Mari slowly got up from the bed. Everything will be OK. It was still early in the morning, and she had all the time to herself, unfortunately.

She made her way to the piano room, still making sure to hold onto the guard rails every step of the way. No matter what she tried to do, the incident still went on vividly in her mind. It was definitely not hard for her to go down the stairs, but on a mental level it was more difficult than any schoolwork she had done.

Mari entered the room and took a glance at the piano. Dust-free. Shiny. Clean. The violin stand, however, was collecting dust like it had been abandoned years ago. A piece of sheet music was resting on both the piano and the violin stand, one of them being tattered and ripped from how much they hated it.

It was a hard pill to swallow and Mari didn’t want to look at it any further. “Maybe playing the song will help me out.” she thought, beginning to take a seat on the bench. Her fingers began to rest on the starting notes as the song began.

The level of playing ability she had exuded could exceed even her peak a few weeks ago, yet something was missing. She had perfected her part of the song, yet it was incomplete without a violin to accompany it. And Sunny was gone, his broken violin stuck in the toy chest to never surface again. A duet could never be perfect without the other person.

Mari’s realization began to hurt. Her pursuit for perfection had ended up costing her brother’s life, and her ability to even be perfect in the first place. She tried looking for calm in the room, yet they were all brutal reminders. The wall had a calendar, indicating that today was supposed to be the recital. The violin stand reminded her that Sunny could never come back, and it was from her own mistakes. The piano reminded her that her own goals would never be accomplished.

She decided to read Sunny’s sheet music. Snatching the paper from the violin stand, she began reading as her elbows rested on the keys. The writing started normally, with things like “add a rest here” and “make sure you hold for 3 seconds”. As she kept reading, the writing got more and more shaky as the comments became more and more depressing. “Give up. Don’t even try at this part”. “Mari would be disappointed in you”. “You should just quit if you can’t do it”. They were all things Mari remembered she had said. She tried to put the sheet music back on the stand, yet Mari couldn’t take her eyes off of it like she was a moth to a lamp.

Mari was on the final page of the sheet music as the comments seemed to evolve into calls for help. The words were almost unreadable from how shaky the words were, yet she managed to figure out a few.

“The violin is ruining me” was one of the sentences visible. Mari was beginning to tear up by now, only being able to read these things from willpower alone. Was it really THAT bad for Sunny that he would write these things? She continued.

“I want to quit” was written multiple times over the parts he kept messing up on. It was heart-breaking to Mari that she had never even tried to interact with Sunny when he got upset, never even took a glance at him. Tears began staining the sheet music as the outside began to get brighter and brighter. 

Most of the other sentences were either unreadable from how crumpled the page was or it being scribbled over in pencil. Except for one. A big, bold word that said one thing.  **“END”.** Mari just stared at the word as she began crying onto the piano keys. The piano made no sound at all, yet her cries filled the silent void. Mari placed the sheet music back on the stand as she began looking at her own.

The notes felt meaningless now. Without anything else to accompany them, it was just… incomplete in Mari’s eyes. She had more positive comments on her own sheet music, yet they felt empty to her. They were lies to try and calm her down, like she did with Hero and Aubrey. Mari tossed the sheet music into the wall as she began to think.

**Why bother with it now, when everything that makes it work would never return?**

**Why bother when the thing she was working towards was already gone?**

**Why try when nobody would even be there to congratulate or applaud her for finishing, even if it was incomplete?**

**Why should she even continue, without Sunny?**

  
  
  


She tried to take her mind off of the situation by playing another song. Music had always been something to help with stress. Shuffling into her piano bench. Mari pulled out a random song. It was “Moonlight Sonata” by Beethoven. A classic. Mari started remembering the past. 

  
  
  


_ It was a sunny day in March as Mari began playing the final section of “Moonlight Sonata”. Sunny and their parents were watching carefully as the last few seconds began to play out. That day was a good day, the result of many hours of practice. The final note hit the piano as they all began to clap. Mari turned around, beginning to smile as she took her hands off the piano keys. Sunny ran up and hugged Mari, his expression telling her what she wanted to hear. “I’m happy for you, Mari” Mari hugged Sunny back, tighter than ever. “I never want to lose you, Sunny. I love you.” _

Now it felt empty. Who was she playing for really? Where was that sweet smile she once knew? The song went from something to calm her down to bringing back bittersweet memories, a time where she felt like someone WAS there for her. Mari tried to play the song, yet everything kept coming out wrong. A note was either too early or too late, she’d miss the perfect note by 1 key, everything seemed to go wrong. Mari got frustrated and slammed the keys in anger. 

She heard a knock from the door. It reminded her of the dream she had, “Kel” asking her if she could open the door. It possibly could be that same “Kel”, who knew. She got up from the bench, slowly making her way to the entrance. Mari grabbed a broom on the way there for self-defense.

“Hello?” Mari asked, broom in hand.

“Hey, it’s Henry.” the voice said. “I uh-wanted to check in on you. Are you doing OK? I know it’s an out-there idea to ask, but Basil—”

The door swung open. Mari was there, broom in hand.

“So uh, are you doing OK, Mari? I know that whole Basil thing got out of hand.” Hero said, trying his best to keep composure.

Mari began to try her best to keep her emotions intact. “N-no— I’m just- I need someone to talk to.”

“Could I come in, then?” Hero asked.  
  
“Y-yes.”

Hero sat down on the single chair and Mari took refuge on the couch.

“I might as well start this conversation,” Hero said, a tint of sadness in his tone, “Was what Basil said true?”

Mari’s expression seemed to tell the whole story for him. She was so confident at first, yet began breaking down like sand in water.

“Y-yes. I did say them.” Mari and Hero began looking at each other. One was silent, trying to process what he had just heard. The other was trying their best to keep calm, and not crocodile tears in the middle of the living room.

“You-you did? I just can’t believe he was right- I always heard of him saying that Sunny was sad, yet he always seemed so happy—” Hero’s hands began supporting his head as he began looking down at the floor.

“It was just in the heat of the moment-” Before Mari could try and make a coherent sentence, tears began falling down her face. Doing these things to Sunny was never hard, they were just words, right? But looking back and explaining them to someone else was extremely difficult for her.

__

“I-i just wanted to be perfect for the recital, I didn’t see that he was that-”

“Why would you do that to Sunny?” Hero said, trying to understand the gravity of the situation. “I’m not angry, i'm just-  _ Why?”  _ Tears began slowly inching down his cheeks as he looked at Mari. Disappointed.

“L-let me explain myself, ok?” Mari said, her voice going higher and higher from how hard she was trying to suppress the sadness. “I-I didn’t know that he was so unhappy with it, h-he never tried to say anything- He could’ve said something to me-” Mari began breaking down again, tears falling onto the floor like rain.

“W-when did this all start? I thought you two were still y’know, brother and sister! Now, it seems like you two had a lot of bad blood.” he responded, trying his best to stay calm himself.

“The recital happened- I wanted to succeed so hard because this was my chance to impress my parents. I think I pushed him too hard-”  
  
“It’s just as bad as Basil said…” Hero muttered under his breath.

“Huh?”   
  
“I-it's nothing. Continue.”

Mari kept on talking. “I-I lost track of who and what I cared about, I was always so focused on the recital. It was like it overtook my senses- I couldn’t care for Sunny-”

“You’re a dirty liar, Mari. I just didn’t know yet.” he said.

“H-huh?”

“Basil was right. I didn’t want to believe him at first, yet that seems to be the case.” his usual joyful tone near Mari was replaced with something cold and bitter. “Sunny was like another younger brother to me, and your words decided to take him from me.” He got up from his seat as he began to leave. 

“NO! Don’t leave me now, Hero! You’re the only one I have left!” Mari said, trying to cling to him. She was already alone in the world, the death of Sunny making that more obvious. She couldn’t lose one more. Mari was surprised when Hero pushed her off.

“Don’t you DARE touch me, Mari!” Hero said, not even trying to look at them as they left through where they entered. “I’ve learnt one thing from this. Sunny’s in a better place now. Away from YOU. Get out of my fucking life.”  
  
Hero began walking away. Mari was so afraid of losing someone she loved, yet that truth became a reality. Mari wanted to try and call for Hero. To call for Sunny. Anyone. Yet HER calls would not be answered. Mari was _alone._

She grabbed a blanket and rolled herself up in a ball before sitting on the couch. Mari began to try and calm down as the sun began rising. Mari wanted to try and think everything was ok. Everything WOULD be ok. But, the truth outweighed her thoughts as she began to cry. It wasn’t ok. NOTHING was ok. It will never be ok.

Mari tried her best to take some time off by sleeping, yet the events kept her up. Over and over she heard the words “Sunny’s in a better place now. Away from YOU.”, situations happening in her head. What if Hero told Aubrey and Kel that it was true? What if her parents found out about the accident? What if the whole NEIGHBORHOOD knew? Mari began to panic as all these scenarios entered her head.

Sure, they were unlikely, and they were all worst-case scenarios. But from how things had gone for her in the past 5 days, it was something to think about. Mari couldn’t just think of the best situation that could happen, she now had to think about the worst.

For the next few hours, she was laying down in bed wide awake. The sky went from a bright orange to an oceanic blue as the day started, yet she didn’t want to go outside. Mari wanted to just sleep off what she was feeling, escape to White Space. Every attempt at it would fail, Hero’s closing words repeating in her mind. It felt like eternity before Mari would finally succumb and get ready for the day.

Today was supposed to be the recital. Mari’s big chance at impressing her parents. However, she had blown it by trying to be perfect. Sunny was gone, and now she had to remember once more. Today was Sunny’s funeral.

Her parents were getting ready in the other room. Mari was already downstairs in her dress clothes, trying her best to stay calm for the day. However, from what Hero had said to her not too long ago, she was already on edge. Mari tried to get all the intrusive thoughts out of their head, yet they infested her brain like a parasite. What if Hero was there? What if Basil was there? What if-

“Sweets? Are you doing OK?” her dad asked. He was towering above from her, looking fairly concerned. 

“Yes dad, I'm doing fine.” she responded, beginning to fluster as she faced the door. 

“You don’t sound that way, are you sure?” Her dad had sat down next to her on the couch as she tried to look away. He slung his arm around Mari’s shoulders. “I know it’s been a rough time for all of us, especially your mother and I. I won't tell you to immediately get over it, we all need time to heal. It’s ok to be sad, Mari. We’ll be there for you every step of the way. Just tell us if you need anything, and we’ll try our best, ok?”

Mari knew he was trying to make her feel better. She knew about the arguments they were having. However, it was the first good thing she had heard in a few days. Mari couldn’t refuse or she’d most likely sink deeper into her own pit. She turned around and hugged her dad as they returned the hug.

“I love you, dad.”  
  
“I love you too, sweets. Tell us if you need anything, ok? I don’t want you to bottle up your emotions. That usually isn’t a good thing.”

Mari got released from the hug as he went back into the room. She decided to go outside and calm down some more. She couldn’t be panicking in the middle of a funeral, that wouldn’t go down well for anyone. For this one event, Mari had to accept that she was wrong, and would deal with the backlash from Basil and Hero. It was the truth.

She began making her way to the church. They could make it themselves. They’re adults, after all. The walk to church had a deafening silence. She could only hear her own breathing and the sounds of the wind passing by. 

The rest of the day was almost as quiet. Everyone was there, yet Mari didn’t have to interact with them. She stood there like the rest, crying their eyes out as Sunny was put 6 feet under. Hero tried to keep his facade up for them, yet it was almost broken as the sight of Sunny’s lifeless body peacefully resting tunnelled into his mind. Aubrey and Basil were affected the most, the ground beneath them soaking up their tears like a sponge Kel’s know-nothing mindset couldn’t help him now as he watched Sunny one last time descend into his resting place.

Mari felt guilty. She had caused all of this. Hero and Basil’s anger, Aubrey’s sadness, Kel’s silent grief, it was all her fault. Just because of her need for perfection. Mari wanted to admit it right there and then, and finally be free from whatever chains they were attached to. But she stayed silent. Even after Mari began walking back home with her parents, her vocal chords felt like they were being glued together. No matter what she tried, it was like something was keeping them shut.

That day, like the others, was spent inside Mari was contemplating her own actions. She had ruined her one chance of safely admitting the truth. Many hours were spent sitting on her bed as day turned to night as she stared at the wall. That piano had caused all of the people close to her misery. Especially Sunny. He had suffered so much and Mari didn’t even try to help. And when he tried to tell Mari he was suffering, Mari pushed him away, so much that it was fatal. Mari would never see him again, just because of her selfishness. She could try all she wanted, but there was only one Sunny.

She drifted off to sleep as Mari began seeing the hallucinations of Sunny. Peacefully sleeping in his bed. It should’ve been that way. It should’ve. Mari should’ve been sleeping peacefully with Sunny by her side, a reminder that things were still OK and she ruined it. It was all her fault.

All her fault.

  
  
  


_ All her fault. _

  
  
  
  
  
**_All her fault._ **


	6. Into the Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mari starts going back into her headspace

“Wake up, sleepyhead!” Kel said, nudging Bini as she laid silently on a sleeping bag. He had been rocking Bini left and right for her to finally wake up.

“You know, Bini’s not gonna be happy when she wakes up.” Aubrey said, pouting as she began looking at the checkerboard. “Bini hates when people begin moving her when she sleeps. Remember when Basil-”

“Hey! We said we wouldn’t talk about that anymore, right?” Hero quickly responded. “Basil’s pretty touchy about that still.” Hero went back to his game of checkers as Basil began slowly walking to the corner, bracing for what would happen.

“Kel, k-knock it off! You know how Bini gets upset when someone messes with her.” Basil said, fear in his voice.

“Oh come on, don’t be such a stick in the mud, Basil! Just because it happened to you doesn’t mean it’ll happen to me-” Kel was cut short by the sounds of groaning behind him. Basil began panicking as Aubrey and Hero continued their checkers game.

“Will she finally wake up? Bini hasn’t woken up for…. I'm not even sure how long myself.” Hero said. “Sunny seems to be getting lonely lately. He has us, but there's no Bini to calm him down all the way.”

“Maybe if KEL didn’t go around throwing rocks, we wouldn’t be here.” Aubrey said, glaring at Kel intensely. 

“HEY! I said “Heads up!” beforehand, it's her fault for not hearing me.” Kel responded, looking back angrily at Aubrey. 

“Who carries a 10 pound rock around, throwing it at the playground to hit some poor kid like Mikhael? I know one person and it’s you!”  
  
“Hey! Mikhael’s fine atleast! And besides, I don’t go around smacking random people with an eggplant, unlike you!”  
  


“THAT’S COMPLETELY FALSE!”

“Ok, ok! Let’s calm down here. I don’t think it’ll be pretty if you guys continue any longer.” Hero said, beginning to take all the pieces from Aubrey’s side of the checkerboard. “Especially for Basil.”

“L-listen, last time we messed with Bini she became… that, and Sunny hasn’t had any REAL contact for a while. The last thing we should do is repeat that.” Basil said, finally coming out of his corner. 

“Basil’s right, you know.” Hero said, looking at Aubrey and Kel in an angry tone. “Why can’t you guys just get along? It’s like you always go at each other's throats just for the fun of it!”

The voices got more muffled as Mari began banging on the white door. Mewo was hiding under the yarn fort to hide from Mari as the slams got louder and louder.

In physical pain, Mari felt nothing. It was a dream, after all. Nothing could harm her, and even if it did, it was from her own volition. However, the mental damage caused to her felt like it was impossible to fix. Over and over were the events of the last 3 days. Sunny’s fall. Basil’s outburst of anger. Hero’s confrontation. They repeated in her head like a broken record.

**“It’s all your fault, Mari. I’ll never forgive you. Leave my life forever.”**

**“YOU CAUSED THIS MARI! YOU DID! YOU DROVE HIM TO SUICIDE AND HE’S GONE!”**

**“MARI! LISTEN TO ME! I NEED YOU TO STOP PUSHING ME! I WANT TO SCREAM YET YOU NEVER ANSWER THE CALLS! HELP ME!”**

No matter what she endured, the voices wouldn’t stop. The door wouldn’t budge either. Every jiggle of the door handle would only enhance the power of the voices on her. Debris from the invisible ceiling of white space began to fall as Mewo began scampering away somewhere. Mari’s attempts to open the door got more and more violent as the ground around her withered away. 

“LET ME IN! PLEASE!” Mari pleaded, asking for help from whoever was in that door. Yet her calls for help were never answered. Just like she never answered Sunny’s. The last piece of ground fell as Mari desperately tried holding on to the doorknob. The door finally opened as Mari was about to slip. With all of her strength, she managed to grab onto a part of the entrance. Mari inched up and finally stood up, walking slowly into the light.

Naturally, Basil, Kel, Aubrey and Hero began cowering away in fear as Mari’s body seemed to start spazzing around on the sleeping bag. They could all hear the muffled screams of Mari as she tried forcing her way through.

“W-what’s hap-happening to Bini?” Aubrey asked, grabbing onto Hero as he tried getting as far as he could away from her.

“I don’t know. It could be ANYTHING.” Hero responded, holding on tight to Kel and Basil as Bini’s spasms got louder as well as her screams. A bright of white light engulfed the room as the four closed their eyes.

Bini awoke as they began opening their eyes. She began heavily breathing to calm herself down, the others looking in disbelief.

“Bini? Are you-uh, ok?” Kel asked, still hiding behind Hero.

“No, not really. My neck is KILLING me.” Bini responded, rubbing her eyes and neck to try and stretch out again. “How long was I sitting there? It’s felt like an eternity!”

“B-Bini, you’re finally back!” Aubrey ran up towards them, almost knocking them to the ground with a hug. Bini returned the favor, lifting her up as they held onto each other. 

Everyone else did the same, except Basil. Hero began hugging her, so tightly it felt like her spine was about to snap in half. Kel tried to do the same, yet was overpowered by Bini in terms of strength. He didn’t seem to mind, though. Kel was happy Bini was back.

And then there was Basil.

He seemed oddly concerned about the whole thing. Basil stayed as far away as he could, cautiously waiting for something to happen. Bini was back, yet the flash of light fueled his curiosity. _What was that flash of light? Why is Bini suddenly awake again? Is she even… real?_

“G-guys? I want to be more cautious about this… what was that flash of light? How is Bini even awake?”

The questions he had didn’t seem to bother the rest, even after his timid attempts at informing them. They were all too busy standing in a group hug with Bini to even try and acknowledge them.

“I have an idea!” Kel said. “Let’s go see Sunny! He really, REALLY misses you, Bini!”

“Sunny?” Bini’s face lit up like a lamp. “I need to see him again!

` “Then let’s go!” Aubrey responded, climbing out of the treehouse. Kel and Hero followed suit, leaving only Basil and Bini.’

Bini went to the door and started going down as Basil seemingly just… stood there. She decided to go back into the treehouse to check on him.

“Basil? Are you ok?” Bini asked, waiting for an answer from Basil’s unmoving face. “I don’t want you to be sad-”

“I know what you’ve done, **Mari.** ” Basil said.

‘H-huh?” Bini asked, looking worried. She walked out of the treehouse yet again, only to hear “You can’t run from what you did.” from below her. Looking at the ground, Basil was there yet again. The ground opened up below her as Bini fell from the rope she was holding onto. Down, down, DOWN into the abyss.

Her fall ended with no sound, only silence. Mari got up from the fall and began looking around. Then she saw it. The broken violin at the bottom of the stairs.

No.. no… it couldn’t be happening to her again. Mari tried closing her eyes, yet her own body refused as it focused on Sunny and Mari, all at the top of the stairs.

_"What did you do?" Mari said, stomping up the stairs. Sunny would not react. "Why would you destroy your violin? Your FRIENDS worked for that!"_

_"I-"_

_"Don't even talk. The recital is so soon, yet you decide to do this? Why?"_

_"You spent so much time on it practicing, yet you decide to throw it away? Why would you do it?"_

**_"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"_ **

The sounds of a skull hitting the stairs began to repeat in Mari’s head. Sunny tumbled down the stairs like a ragdoll as the one at the top of the stairs devilishly grinned. 

“You wanted this. You were always so jealous of Sunny, and you took your one chance to end his life.” the one at the top of the stairs said, Sunny’s body finally tumbling onto the violin. “You’re selfish”

“T-thats not true!” Mari responded. “I l-loved him! I didn’t mean to-”

“You’re a liar. Those words are only there to protect yourself from judgement.”

“I’m telling the truth here! Stop trying to mess with-”

“If you’re so truthful about what you did to Sunny, how are you so afraid of seeing what happened? Are you really telling the truth?”

Sunny’s screams of agony as his last moments played filled the cold air, Mari beginning to try and stop them. No matter what she did, it burrowed it's way into her mind and kept on repeating.

**“MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!”** Mari pleaded, the figure at the top of the stairs only able to smile. **“PLEASE! I’M SORRY! FORGIVE ME!”**

_“Forgiveness is not an option here, Mari.”_

She began breathing heavier and heavier. Head in her hands, she tried expunging it from her memory. Mari never wanted the image of Sunny’s body bleeding out in her mind, yet it was given to her. It was all something Mari never wanted to happen.

The piano had caused this. The recital caused this. Sunny caused it. Mari tried looking for an excuse to blame it on. Surely it wasn’t HER fault, right? Right? Right-

Bini snapped back to reality as someone threw cold water at her face.  
  


“Hey, are you ok?” Basil asked, an empty cup in his hand.

“W-what happened? I thought I was at the treehouse..” Bini responded.

“You began screaming about some weird stuff while you were just spazzing out on the grass. Who were you even begging for forgiveness from? You know we all trust you, right?” Aubrey said, confused as ever. “We had to drag you here while Hero got to sat down and do nothing.”

“What- no, I didn’t-” Bini got another cup full of cold water on her face. “HEY! One is enough, you know!”

“Oh! Uh… sorry then.” Kel said, pulling the cup away from Bini as he whistled back to the water.

Bini got up from the ground and looked around once more. This time, they were at the lake, the water glistening in the sun. A small dock was at the front of the lake, almost reaching the middle.

“Is Sunny still ok?” Bini asked. Despite her head hurting like she was bashed in the head with a baseball bat, Bini still wanted to see him, to at least tell him that she was alright.

“Uhh… yes! He’s still on the picnic blanket. I think Hero managed to calm him down!” Aubrey said. “He was shaking like he was REALLY scared, but Sunny’s fine!”

Before Basil could even look at Bini again, she started sprinting through the small opening to the lake. “Wait!” Basil yelled, but there was no answer. The three decided to follow her to make sure she was safe.

The park was empty as Sunny and Hero sat in silence. Sunny was still shaky as Hero tried his best to calm him down.

“Don’t worry Sunny… everything is going to be ok. I know it will!” Hero said. Despite his attempts, Sunny still had a panicked expression on his face. His breathing was still heavy and it felt like he was turning purple from the amount of oxygen and emotions he was holding onto. Bini came running in as Hero could finally take a breath of fresh air.

Bini almost tackled Sunny with a hug as she held on tight. “I’m alright Sunny, you don’t need to panic. It’s ok. It’s ok.” Sunny tried to calm down, yet Sunny was still shaky like an earthquake had hit him as he clung to Bini, sobbing his eyes out.

Kel was the first to reach the park, gasping for air. “Geez Bini, why did you have to run so fast?” he said, panting between each word. “At least you’re not hurt.” He sat down near Bini as Aubrey and Basil also arrived.

  
“Haah… Aubrey! You didn’t need to drag me around like that! That hurts!” Basil said, messing with the collar of his shirt to revert it back to normal.

“Hey, don’t blame me! I didn’t want Bini to trip on a rock again!” Aubrey responded, brushing the dirt off of her dress as she walked to the blanket. Basil followed suit, gasping for air in each step. Sunny finally started calming down a bit as his friends surrounded him. He stopped crying like he was watering the ground beneath him and sat in silence.

“There there, Sunny. I’m safe. You have us, you don’t need to worry.’ Bini said, having Sunny in her arms as the rest of them did the same.  
  
“Come on Sunny, you know Bini is fine! She may have been hurt a bit, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world!” Kel said. Sunny obviously had a strange look at Kel, knowing he had put Mari into comatose, yet he formed a slight smile.

“Yeah! You have Bini, Kel, me, Aubrey, Hero, we all care for you, Sunny!” Basil said, smiling at him. Sunny returned the favor, his slight smile turning to a grin. It was rare for Sunny to say anything about how he felt, but the expressions told the whole story.

“I never want to abandon you, Sunny.” Bini said, finally releasing him from the hug. “I want to see you be happy. Can you promise that for me?”

Sunny silently nodded.

“That’s good.” Bini said, joyfully speaking as the rest of the group did the same. They were all back together again, and that’s all that mattered. They were so busy indulging in each other, group hugs and all that none of them could notice something strange.. except Bini. She looked up and into the forest as she saw a silhouette.

It was… SOMETHING. She didn’t know what it was, yet it creeped her out. Bini stayed silent though, not wanting to sour the mood that everyone was in. She looked away from it and went back to hugging the group.

Bini finally got out of the hug as everyone began smiling and laughing about something Kel had done at the lake She wanted to join in, yet curiosity overwhelmed her.

“Give me a few minutes, I need to check out something.” Bini said, getting up from the blanket and dusting herself off before walking towards the forest.

  
“Well, ok then! Stay safe, Bini!” Hero said, making sure to stay close to Sunny so he could make sure he was still being happy. Bini reached the opening as she entered the clearing the figure walked into.

She went through the opening and looked at her surroundings. It was a small hill, filled with various meadow flowers as the trees enclosed the area. The only opening was a small entrance from the trees. Bini remembered Basil going here sometimes to calm down after Kel messed with him a bit, always coming here to bring him back to the park. She saw the silhouette at the top of the hill.

It looked like an IV drip supplying a monster that was almost unrecognizable, yet still humanoid. It stood at the summit, unmoving. The wind went quiet as it was only Bini and the silhouette, staring each other down.

  
Bini made her way up the hill. She wanted to know what it was, yet there was a looming threat of dread in her mind. It felt like that silhouette carried bad omens for Bini and her friends, like it was a message from somewhere else. Surely it couldn’t mean _that_ much, right?

She reached the top of the hill as the silhouette stood in front of her, looking away. Bini walked up to it and, being clueless about what it was, decided to try and give it a poke. It turned around almost immediately, it’s face being fully visible to Bini. It was Sunny’s face, yet it was deformed so much it was barely visible. 

**“MARI? DO YOU LOVE ME?”** it asked, Bini falling to the ground in fear. It asked the same question once again as she tried to get away.

**“ANSWER ME!”** it pleaded, it’s voice distorted like a busted CD. _**“WHY WONT YOU ANSWER ME?”**_ Bini was AFRAID from the distorted Sunny getting closer and closer. Her attempts at escape were futile, frozen by fear.

_**“MARI! PLEASE! DO YOU LOVE ME?”**_ Bini tried one more time to escape, yet it felt like she was glued to the dirt. It began inching closer and closer to her, the face distorting even further. Bini tried one last thing. She closed her eyes. All Bini could hear was the distorted cracking of something as it got even darker.  
  
**"I never want to let go of you again."** the Sunny said, the last inch of daylight finally escaping.  


_  
**Welcome to White Space.** _

  
  
  
  
Mari woke up. Her breathing was heavier than anvils as Mari made sure she was safe, cautiously looking around. The space around her was white as the yarn, basket and book were still where they usually were, seemingly untouched. Mewo started rubbing on Mari’s legs with a soft “Meow!” inbetween. She felt calm for a moment, knowing that she was in White Space. Almost nothing could enter. It should’ve been a calm moment in the raging storm that she had just experienced, yet Mari was not at ease. She felt like something was wrong, even in her small little mind room.

  
Mari got up from her little blanket and walked over to the stairs. She placed her hands onto the railing and began considering her options. She could try walking down the stairs and go back to reality, where she’d have to deal with Basil, Hero, all of them if they tried interacting with her. Mari could try walking back into the door and retreat back to her headspace, with Basil and Sunny still intact. And then there was a final option, staying in white space until the hands pulled her away, forcing her to wake up anyways.

Before Mari could even consider what options she could choose from and figure out what they were doing, she felt something try and push her. The first one was pretty light, Mari turning around to figure out who had pushed her. The second one knocked Mari's grip from the top of the stair railing off, sending Mari rolling down the stairs.

In her almost 45 seconds of remaining conscious, she had so many questions in that short span of time. Who had pushed her in their own mind? Why were these stairs so long? And why did the pain feel so.. real? Mari bashed her arm on the railing as she tried to stop herself, and being unable to clutch the arm it took its toll on Mari. 

It felt like every step took more and more blood away from Mari’s head as she tumbled down the endless stairs. Mari felt like she was 10 seconds away from passing out as more and more bruises appeared on her legs and arms like she was morphing into a giant blueberry. She wouldn't have to wait long to finally be knocked out when she fell jaw-first onto the edge of a step, and then banged her head on the railing. She couldn't take the pain and blacked out.

Mari woke up yet again in the real world, sweating like she was drenched in a rainstorm. Breathing heavily, she looked outside the window. The sun was about to set as the sky blazed a bright orange, filled with gray clouds rolling in from the east and west. The view was pretty, watching the morning sun finally disappear as the sky turned a cold blue. No amount of breath-taking sights could ever soften the blow from what she realized.

Even in her own thoughts, she wasn’t safe. The images and guilt from Sunny’s death had seeped into Mari’s dreams. She only had her parents to talk to, and even then that seemed rare, as it always felt like they were always bickering with no time to speak. There was no Hero, no Basil, no Aubrey,  **nothing** to help her deal with the stress or even just goof around with. She was **alone.** Mari could only pray for a light to break the abyss as she sat silently in her now lonely bedroom.  
  
She turned to look at Sunny’s bed, and began to sob. Mari should've been there for _him._ Even if she had lost all hope before, they had Sunny to take care of and love. Sunny was like the sun to her in Mari's own little solar system. And without the sun to support the planets, nothing would work out. Now Sunny was gone, and everything seemed to spiral out of control. Basil had his outburst of anger from Mari trying to calm people down. She had broken Hero's trust with her lie and it had come back to haunt her, his words before leaving sticking into her mind. Mari couldn't even fathom what would happen to Aubrey and Kel. She didn't want to think about it as they began focusing on the bed.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Sunny. I did this to you." Mari said, her pillow becoming a sponge for tears.  
  
"I wish you were here to forgive me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i do not like writing headspace :(
> 
> probably my weakest chapter so far but eh its decent
> 
> chapter 7 will probably be wholesome so stick around for that


	7. Dealing with Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari copes. (Probably.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short one but this only took me so long because im lazy oops
> 
> hoping there arent any errors n stuff
> 
> if you cried tell me in the comments below

Mari woke up the next day in a pool of her own tears. She had cried herself to sleep yesterday, not being able to find a way to cope with Sunny’s death yet. The room had felt emptier than ever before, the only things Mari could hear being her own breathing and heartbeat.

Obviously, Mari could never keep living with a grimace on her face. Maybe she could calm herself down with something she liked, and knitting came to her mind. Her mother had taught it to her a few years ago, and knitting usually kept her mind off of things and more avoiding poking herself.

Leaving her room, Mari once again went down the stairs. She gripped the handrails even harder this time, vaguely remembering the dream they had. Her parents were at work, leaving only Mari and her thoughts for the day.

Before she could open the door to get some yarn, Mari hesitated. Her hand hovered over the doorknob, barely being able to touch it. She remembered what was in that closet, and what she had done. If she wanted to look in there, Mari would have to remember that wretched day.

She took her hand off the doorknob and began moving her way. She wanted to knit, yet it was locked behind bad memories. Maybe cooking would help ease her nerves, Mari thought. Besides, she had to eat something.

Mari arrived at the kitchen and began rummaging through the cabinets for something to eat. Nothing seemed too appealing at the moment, so she decided to go with something simple. Some eggs.

She sat down patiently as Mari listened to the sizzling of the eggs. It wasn’t the most pleasant noise to listen to, yet it was something to fill the silence. Mari got up from her chair to check on the eggs. Just in time, as they were almost burnt. As Mari turned around to take a seat at the table, she almost dropped the plate as Mari saw Sunny just sitting there at the table.

Or atleast, she wanted to see him. Instead, Mari saw the empty table. There were 4 chairs, and 3 of them wouldn’t be filled today. She sat down and ate her eggs in silence. Across from her was an empty seat, usually filled with someone joyful and happy. Mari didn’t want to look.  
  
Mari left the kitchen emptier than before, despite being full from breakfast.

She had to think of something, hell, ANYTHING to avoid staring at the wall for 5 hours. Mari decided to try playing a song on piano again, making their way to the door of the piano room. 

Just like the closet, Mari’s hand hovered over the doorknob. She knew what had occurred in this room. All the verbal abuse she had tormented Sunny with. All the times she had ignored Sunny’s pleas for help. They were memories she wanted to lock away and burn like a forest fire, and finally forget. Yet her passions were in that metaphorical box. Mari would have to throw them away to forget. All those years, thrown away like an old toy.  
  
She didn’t know what to do. Mari began focusing more on the doorknob, soon becoming the only thing she could focus on.. That doorknob had more implications than it seemed. She could either try to move on, sacrificing her years spent on practicing to stop thinking about the past. Or, she could hold on to the past, keeping her talents and skills, but having to remember the horrible past. One that Mari had wanted to lock away.

Mari walked away from the door, back to her room. She wanted to forget about all of this. Who cares about that piano anyways? Only her. And only Mari could remember all those bad memories. Nobody else.

She only had one other option, and that was going outside. Mari considered it for a bit, yet decided to shelf it for now. Hero or Basil could pop out at any moment and begin lambasting them in public, something Mari didn’t want to deal with now.

Besides, Mari always had tomorrow. Tomorrow would be the day she wanted to go outside.

She said it again. “For sure, tomorrow i’ll go on a small walk. Only 5 minutes.” She was only too sad for today to be that day. Maybe tomorrow would be that day.  
  
And again.  
  
And again.  
  
And again.

For a whole month, Mari repeated the phrase “i’ll do it tomorrow” to herself while she stared at the wall. Even when her parents tried asking her if everything was alright, Mari said the same words. “I’m fine, just give me some space.” Repetition became a part of her routine. Staring at the wall, saying “i’ll do it tomorrow”, and “i’m fine.” Staring at the wall, saying “i’ll do it tomorrow”, and “i’m fine.” Staring at the wall, saying “i’ll do it tomorrow”, and “i’m fine.” 

It felt like Mari was going mad, with how much the days seemed to blend together. Each day was the same, feeling like they were only watching a repeat of the previous day in her mind. Mari still ate after all, not wanting to just starve herself of sadness. She looked at the calendar again as the boxes began being crossed off like they were a multiple choice left. Box after box, all until only a week remained. 

The next day started like every other before it, staring at the walls. Her parents were once again away for the weekend, Mari rotting away on the bed like an old piece of wood.

Suddenly,  _ “Knock, Knock, Knock.” _ She paid no attention to it at first, knowing that they were usually just the mail. Nothing too important. Mari kept staring at the walls until she began hearing a muffled voice. Mari could only decipher one word from the phrase, and it was her own name.

Mari was curious, and decided to see who was at the door. She got out of bed and began to stretch, her joints popping like a toy. It felt unjustified, but she felt uneasy. That door could have anyone, anyTHING behind it and she would be none the wiser.

“Hello?” Mari said, staying a few feet away from the door.  
  
“H-hey, it’s me, Henry! I just want to apologize to you.” the voice said in a sad tone. 

Her unease was now justified. Henry was at the door once again, wanting to talk. She remembered the last time Henry was at the door, all she could hear was some shouting and a door slamming shut, Mari not having a chance to even talk about her problems. However Mari knew that it had been a full month since Hero’s outburst, maybe he could’ve changed by now. She sat down on the chair to think as Henry waited.

Mari tuned out the rest of the room and began focusing only on the door. She could hear Henry’s voice getting more and more desperate as she kept thinking about what would happen. What if Henry was only there to yell at her again for not being there for Kel and Aubrey? What if he was there to tell him that he knew the truth all along? What if he was truly sorry?   
  


She heard one last sentence. “Fine. I guess you’re still going to be like that.” Mari knew that this was her last chance to admit her faults, or atleast having someone to vent her problems without major backlash. 

Her hand rested on the doorknob. Opening that door would most likely lead to more problems, yet at least she could MAYBE stay friends with Aubrey, Kel, and Hero, at least having people to talk to. OR, she could stay in the house, isolating herself from her friends and some of her problems. She only had a small amount of time to think, starting to see Henry walk away from the door in the small peephole.  
  
Mari realized she couldn’t make the same mistake twice. Not after losing Sunny. She couldn’t lose Hero as well, her only remaining close friend. Or atleast, she hoped. She hesitated a lot, but Mari finally opened the door, hoping that he was not fully gone yet.

“Henry?”  
  
She called out for Henry from her doorway, looking around the front of her house for him. Mari could only see one person in her view, walking off into the horizon as the rest of the place stayed silent.

Mari had wasted her second chance. She knew that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, to finally be able to apologize to Henry, and maybe the rest of the gang. She could finally free herself from these shackles locking her away for more than a month now. Mari could finally be at ease.

And yet Mari decided to hesitate.

The rest of the day were like the ones before it, contemplating what had happened as she quietly laid in bed. Mari’s chance at redemption had left as quickly as it came, at least in her head. All of these toxic thoughts about the consequences filled her mind like helium in a balloon. What would happen if she tried to talk to Henry? To Basil? What if she told the truth to Henry, what would he think and do?

These questions lasted all until night fell, Mari finally tiring out and beginning to rest her head on the pillow. As she looked at the ceiling, she saw something else. Instead of the plain ceiling, it was… Sunny. Torn and mangled. Blood started to drip onto Mari’s bedsheets as she tried to escape.

Nothing. The blanket kept her trapped in as she could only watch, the Sunny getting 

closer and closer. Blood seemed to flood the room as Mari was almost in breathing distance of the thing.

_ “WHy wOuLd yoU DO tHis tO Me, MArI? wHY?! WhY?!” _ it screeched, Mari trying her best to endure the pain. The blood was at her bedside, staining everything around it.

_ “YoU cOuLd’ve helPEd mE, yeT yOu nEvEr dId! It’s all yOur faULt!” _ it said once again, Mari beginning to cry. Her bed was now a dark red as Sunny’s face distorted more and more, eventually morphing into something unrecognizable. His face was a void, starting to consume everything around him.

She closed her eyes, tears managing to glue them shut. The ungodly cacophony was filling her air, full of screams, screeches, and pained cries. Mari wanted it to stop. Her hands were up at her ears, trying to silence any sort of cries coming from this creature, yet they wouldn't work. It would never work. She couldn’t salvage anything. Her friends, her relationships, Sunny, nothing would work. Nothing. Nothing at all-  
  
“MARI!” her dad shouted. She snapped back to reality, her heart rate high as a mountain as they looked around. There was no blood or red bead. There was no noise filled with the misery of those she had wronged. 

There was no Sunny.

“Jeez, you’re gonna give me a panic attack from that. What even happened, Mari? I’m starting to get worried.” Mari tried looking for words to say, yet nothing was ever released from her vocal chords.

“You can always talk to us, ok?” her dad said. “It feels like you’ve just been… staying

away from us. Like we’ve done something wrong. Have we done something wrong, Mari?” he began to sob as Mari finally found something to say.

“It’s just… Sunny.” Mari said. “I really miss him.”  
  
Mari’s dad sighed as he tried not to cry an ocean of tears. “I do too, Mari. He always had a liking to you, someone Sunny always knew he could trust. I’ve seen you during Christmas, during summer, even during those times in the backyard. He loves you. Wouldn’t you want to remember that?”

She couldn’t even say anything other than staring at her bed. Mari knew the truth of those words. Sunny hated her ever since he got that violin. His passion always looked so ignited, and she snuffed it out like it was nothing. Mari couldn't express these thoughts or.. she didn't want to imagine what would happen. Mari’s dad looked at her.

“If you ever feel sad about Sunny, just remember that he would’ve loved you even in the afterlife. I’ll be going back to bed now.” Mari got a kiss on the forehead. “I love you, sweetie.”

“I love you too, dad.”

He looked at Mari one last time before leaving and closing the door behind him, leaving only Mari. She didn’t want to think about the words her dad had said to try and cheer her up. He was not at fault here, he was only trying his best. All of these thoughts would be for tomorrow's Mari to think about.

Mari laid down once more, looking at the ceiling. Nothing. Mari’s heartbeat finally came down to a crawl as she closed her eyes, taking in the full embrace of her bed. Warm. Comfortable. It reminded her of the good times, when Sunny was still young.

Mari wanted a calm moment in the sea of chaos. Maybe she could find it here.


	8. The Door to Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mari exit house????????

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did not spell check this a lot before publishing oh no
> 
> if you notice mega errors that take away from the story tell me

“I DO think a rabbit would win against a bird, you know.” Kel said, sitting at the picnic basket with all of his friends. “It has wings yeah, but look at those legs! I could kick Aubrey with them!”  
  
“Hey!” Aubrey responded, angrily looking at Kel. “I’d let a bird pick YOU up and take you away!”  
  
“Like you could ever do that!” Kel said, beginning to laugh at Aubrey while she only stared at him, unamused. It was only seconds away before a major fight happened and they were at each other's throats.  
  
“Oh, knock it off!” Hero said. “Rabbits and birds are always beaten by sprout moles! Haven’t you seen one?” 

“Oh, you’re dead wrong Hero!” Aubrey and Kel said in unison. 

“How am I wrong? Have you seen Basil fight a sprout mole?” Hero said, chuckling to himself.   
  
“H-hey! That’s mean!” Basil spat out, crossing his arms. “At least nobody else has seen you near a spider!” Those words made Hero shut up as Aubrey and Kel kept giggling.

Bini only watched as Sunny was laying peacefully next to her, snoozing the days away. Despite the arguing and laughing being louder than Kel, he managed to still sleep like it was the dead of night. Bini could only wonder how they did it.

The 4 finally cooled off as they came to an agreement. Hero was afraid of spiders and a spider could beat every animal on the planet. Basil finally seemed to be confident in his voice as he was laughing with Kel, Aubrey and Hero, laying on a bed of their arms.

“See? I knew I had the right idea!” Basil said, staring into the sky with a dumb grin on his face. “It’s always the small stuff you have to look at.”  
  
“I think it’s unfair a spider has all of that… makes me even more scared than before.” Hero responded, also looking into the sky. “How do you even know any of that?” 

  
“Lets just say I have to deal with that a LOT.” Basil said, looking a bit timid as he kept looking at the sky.

Bini loved being in the playground. Every single day was a nice day, rain or shine. They would always start a conversation and end it with hugs and relaxing, laying on the picnic blanket.   
  


And she always made sure to enjoy it with Sunny. Any day with Sunny was a good day. His expressions told a thousand words, always cheering someone up if they were down. Sunny was the perfect brother to her. Bini wanted to be the perfect sister to him.

“Man, i'm tired!” Kel said, yawning as he began to close his eyes. The rest of the gang followed suit, beginning to lay down where they sat and started to rest. A few minutes had passed, and everyone was already knocked out. 

Except Bini.

Despite her joys in the dream world, all of her friends being there for her, it felt.. wrong. Everybody loved her, yet it felt false. Everybody wanted to help Bini when she felt sad, yet it felt like it was helping false feelings. Everyone wanted Bini to help them, yet her help felt like she was lying.

What were these feelings? Bini didn’t want to pay that much attention, though. They were only thoughts. And thoughts she didn’t want to have right now. Bini laid down next to Sunny, and began to drift off to sleep.

  
  
  


**_Welcome to White Space. You’ve been here for as long as you can remember._ **

  
  
  
  


Bini had sat up from her blanket fortress once again. She had become accustomed to her setting, waking up in a blank white area with nothing but herself and a few things becoming everyday things. Mewo was next to her, resting on their yarn bed. The black light still shined, it’s power source still being a question Bini could never answer.

Her thoughts from earlier tried seeping into her mind, yet Bini managed to ignore them. They’re not thoughts Bini ever wanted to think about again. She had them locked away a long time ago.

The stairs were ready for her as Bini made her way down. No matter what happened to White Space, the stairs were always there. For some reason, they made her… calm. They were a sense of peace as she was lowered into the darkness.    
  


Down…   
  
  
  
  
  
  
_ Down... _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_Down…_ **

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


Mari woke up with the sun in their eyes. Turning to the window, the sun was just rising as the sky started changing into a lighter blue. A small light was blinking in the other direction, from the phone. Mari slowly got up from bed to see what it was. Still rubbing the sand out of her eyes, she clicked the button to hear the message.

“Hey, honey! I know it’s been a pretty tough month so far for you and I. I’ve been away for a bit to plan our move to the city and you’ve been preparing to adjust to it. College will be closer when we move, so that will be nice. A change of scenery will also be good for the both of us, don’t you agree? Three more things, remember to do your chores! The movers will be here a few days, and we don’t want to leave a bad impression, don’t we? The chore list will be in the kitchen. Make sure you get them done! Second, you should start packing your things today! I don’t want you panicking over not being ready to leave. It’s good to be ready! Lastly, that “Henry” boy seems to be knocking on our door every week after we put up the “for sale” sign on our house. He seems to miss you a lot! I know ever since…. that happened, you’ve been pretty… I don’t know how to describe it. It’s been tough for you, I know, but you should at least pay him one more visit before we leave. It’s courteous! Maybe you could even check in with your other friends too! I love you, see you soon!” BZZT!

Her mom was right. There were only about 3 days left before they had their big move to the city, and the house was still a mess. That last part though, she didn’t want to think about. Henry was not someone she needed to remember right now. Mari decided to start packing her things, grabbing an empty box and tossing it onto her bed.

She began rummaging through her dressers for things to pack. The first thing she found was a note, crumpled from being crushed by everything else in the drawer. The name “Mewo” could be seen in permanent marker on it.

“MEWO”. A name she still remembered to this day. Tears started to fall onto the ground as she remembered what had happened. 

_It was a bright and sunny day during July, Mari doing what she did best. Wasting away in her house. Mewo was sitting right next to hear, digging her head onto her legs as the duo started to relax. Life had been pretty shaky still recently, but Mewo kept Mari calm. It was one of the few things from years ago she could still hold on, and she held tight. She fed Mewo, made sure Mewo was healthy, all of that. And it seemed like she was fine._ _  
__  
_ _Until the next day, where all of it came tumbling down like a demolished building._

_ She woke up the next day with silence. Walking downstairs to see if anything had happened today, Mewo wasn’t on their bed sleeping away, and a note laid quietly on the table in the living room. She decided to read it. _

_ “When you read this Mari, I’m currently at the vet with Mewo. They were acting strange, and started coughing a lot. I don’t know what’s happening with her, but she should be fine. I’ll be back soon. Love, Mom.” _

_ Mari was.. confused. Mewo had never been to the vet before other than some check-ups, and they were usually healthy every single time. What could’ve happened? Her fears would be quelled, right? Mewo would come back through the door and pounce on her, ready for endless cuddles. _

_ After that day, Mewo never entered the house ever again. Mewo’s collar was still there, resting on the bed. It waited endlessly for it’s owner to wear it once again. Mari still hoped that Mewo was out there, somewhere in the world, yet those were hopeless thoughts. _

Tears stained the note as Mari tried her best not to just break down onto the floor. Mewo was unfairly taken from the world too early. Just like Sunny.

She placed the note back into the dresser and kept searching for things to pack. Her desk lamp and some old books were placed into her personal box, while some other things like old toys were placed in the “Don’t Keep” box. Old memories were tossed away like they didn’t mean anything to her. She was fine with that.

She continued until she found some old school papers. They were all essays about books, trying to explain every detail about it. Mari always loved school. It was the greatest way of taking her mind off of things. 

It never took it fully away, though.

  
  
  
  


_ “Listen, Mari can’t stay like this forever.” her dad said. The door was closed and she was in bed, yet could listen to the argument clearly. “I know you’ve adjusted to her being a shut-in, yet this isn’t healthy. We NEED to get her outside.” _

_“No, we can’t. I don’t think she’s ready yet.” her Mom responded, trying to stay firm in her tone._ _  
__  
_ _“Come on! It’s almost been a year since Sunny… you know what happened. She can be sad all she wants, and I support that. But I don’t think I know anyone who’s been sad for so long they don’t want to do.. anything.”_

_“Listen, Gary. I know you want change for Mari, but this seems way too fast! She still needs some time to heal.”_ _  
__  
_ _“It’s already been a while since Mari started staying inside. Why am I the only one who can help her? I’ve been trying to get her out of the house and not sacrifice her well-being for comfort and yet you seem to support it!”_ _  
__  
_ _“Oh, come on! You’re not the one who tries comforting her! All you want her to do is go outside, yet you never try to help her with emotions! At least make her calm down.”_ _  
__  
_ _“Now you’re acting smug, huh? Just because I “don’t” help her enough? Because I don’t “care”? You’ve never cared for her well being, all you do is baby her! She’s old enough to be emotionally mature about these kinds of things.”_

_ “GARY, YOU’RE ALWAYS SO-” _

_ Her memory of that conversation stopped there. Mari didn’t want to hear anymore of it. She stuck her head under her pillow and tried to sleep. Muffled yelling helped fill the silence of her room, making her unable to.  _

_ A door was slammed, and the house went quiet. _

_ The next day, Mari asked what had happened the night before. Mari’s mother said that her dad was just “going somewhere” and “he’d be back soon, I promise.” The words were emptier than her parent’s room the next week. _

_ Deep down, Mari knew it was her fault. _

  
  


After that memory, Mari tossed the papers into the “Throw away” box and went back to digging for things to keep. She never wanted to remember that event after it happened, only causing a path of misery for her in the future.

Half an hour had passed and Mari was still working on packing her things. Almost every item seemed to remind her of some tragic event in the past, and was sent to the “throw away” box. Mari hated the past, and always desired to move away from it. Memories are never truly gone, though.

Mari decided to take a break from packing and sat at the desk, staring at the wall with no rhyme or reason. Dust covered the computer, a blank void in place of what should be a colorful canvas. 

She began thinking about the future. Mari and her mom would abandon Faraway town and move to the city, away from all her friends, all the people she knew, everyone except her mom. Although, maybe that’d be a good thing. Mari’s friends didn’t care about her anymore ever since that incident 3 years ago, at least in her mind. Basil and Hero hated her, Kel wouldn’t even notice if she was gone, Aubrey would probably KILL Mari if she saw her again, the only person who would care is her therapist. Mari picked up her mom’s therapist note and began to remember.

  
  
  


_ Mari was always shaken up after her dad was gone. Her mother desperately wanted to make her happy, by saying everything would be alright. From her own experiences though, those words meant nothing to her. Empty words to make someone have a false sense of security, just for all of it to fall. _

_ Eventually, her mom had to do something. She came home one day and said something to Mari about a therapist. _

_“I know it’s sudden and all, but I’ve decided to get you a therapist. I know you’re still trying to cope, so I think she would help.”_ _  
__  
_ _“Mom, you’ve tried this before and you know how that went. How will this even change?”_ _  
__  
_ _“I know you haven't had the best experiences, but think of it! Maybe this will finally help you! Gary would’ve wanted this, wouldn’t he?”_

_“Ok, fine. I’ll see if it works.”_ _  
__  
_ _Mari wore a grimace on her face during the rest of the day, but knew this was her chance to finally admit her faults. The last time this chance happened was 2 years ago, and she sacrificed it for a life of comfort and sloth. A mistake that would still plague her today. Mari waited patiently for the next day to arrive._

_ This time, she’d make it right. Surely, she can’t throw it away twice. _

_ The next day, the therapist had arrived and sat down with Mari in the living room while her mom was at a meeting. She tried her best to stay calm as they introduced herself. _

_“Hello, I’m Susan. Nice to meet you, what is it?”_ _  
__  
_ _“It’s Mari.”_

_“Alright, Mari. Your mother told me that you needed some help with your emotions. Is that correct?”_ _  
__  
_ _Mari was flustered as she tried looking for a way to weasel out of the situation._

_“ I can tell you definitely don’t like talking about this, huh? Well, that’s fine. You can work at your own pace of getting through your emotions. Your mom won’t hear about any of this either, so you’re free to express any concerns or worries you have. Do you understand?”_ _  
__  
_ _“Yes, I do.”_

_“That’s good. If you don’t want to tell me something, you can always do that too. I don’t want to force your emotions out of you. That’d just make you less trusting of me. Alright?”_ _  
__  
_ _“...alright.”_ __  
_  
_ __“Good. Let’s begin.” Susan took out a clipboard and some paper and began the session.

_ Despite how nice and easy-going Susan was during the sessions, Mari could never obtain the confidence to admit what was eating her mind. Every session would be like the times her dad would try to comfort her to get her out of the house. Mari would say that “she was fine” and “she was doing well emotionally” on repeat for 30 minutes every week. Despite what she wanted to do, something always pulled her back. _

_ Mari never knew if she would get out of the hole she had dug herself. She yearned for the rope and never climbed it once it had arrived. It happened so many times that the hole had become her home. At least she could be alone here. _

_ Alone. _

The note was trashed as Mari began to walk out of her room. She had already spent the early morning packing her things, so she might as well get started on the other chores. Walking downstairs to the kitchen, the door started to shake.

“Knock, knock, knock.”

Mari knew this was a common occurrence by now. Usually, it’d be some sort of mail left on the porch. Sometimes it was weird ads, sometimes it was from someone her mom knew, and most of the time it was homework. She didn’t mind it until a voice came from outside.

“Mari? It’s me, Hero!” the voice said. Mari froze in her tracks, turning to the door. “I saw that for-sale sign you had on your front lawn, and I mostly just wanted to say goodbye before you leave. So, please?”

She walked to the door and placed her hand on the doorknob. The same thing had happened 3 years ago, and she had abandoned him for the safety of her home. Mari wouldn’t hesitate this time. It had been 3 years and she had one more shot at making it right.

Mari opened the door.


	9. Checking In Once Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari checks in on her friends. Reason it's so long because I condensed every event of Day 1 into seperate chapters.

Mari didn’t know what was more strange, the shock on Hero’s face or what she had just managed to accomplish. For the first time in a while, she managed to breathe in the fresh air once again. The birds were chirping as the sun began to shine brighter than she had ever seen.

“O-oh, I never expected you to actually come outside.” Hero said, looking flustered as he began rubbing the back of his head, thinking of what to do. “I uh… never had anything planned for today. To be honest, I never thought you’d come out of that place until you left!” Henry cautiously chuckled. Mari only stared at him, once more taking in the sights of the outside world.

“So uh… do you just want to go to the plaza or something? Maybe we can mess around in Hobbeez, or go check out Gino’s, I don’t know. You can choose.” Hero spoke, still trying to find his confidence.

“I guess the Plaza?.” Mari exclaimed, still in a confused tone just like Hero.

“That’s great! We should get going then.” Hero said, finally sounding more confident in his voice. 

“Alright!” Mari said, the emotion in her voice surpassing anything she had said in the last 3 years of isolation. “But, I have one question.”  
  
“Where’s everyone else? I wonder what Kel, Aubrey, and Basil are up to these days.”

Hero went quiet as his excited mood turned to a cold, silent one. He kept walking towards the plaza as Mari followed, waiting for an answer. The walk to Hobbeez was just as quiet, Mari’s attempts at answering being followed by nothing. 

“Well, here we are! Nothing has really, well, changed at all in Hobbeez while you were gone. Only a few items changed and those comics Aubrey used to read now being “Vintage” or whatever. I’ve wanted to get one for old time’s sake, but they’re so expensive!”

Mari’s curiosity was in full swing already. Hobbeez was the most solid memory she had of Faraway, so it’d be interesting to see how it had changed. A few bells rang as Mari entered, the shopkeep turning around to his customers.

“Oh, hello Henry! And- Mari, could that be you?” The shopkeep was confused as he rubbed his glasses. “I haven't seen you in ages! Where have you been all this time?”  
  
Mari squirmed around as she looked for an easy answer. “I’d uh… prefer not to say. It’s kinda personal.”  
  
“That’s fine!” the shopkeep said, getting excited like a small child on christmas. “I’m just glad to see you again. You were always the nicest to me! Unlike that Kel kid.” He scoffed as his tangent began. “He’s always so noisy and annoying, he always makes a mess and it takes me ages to clean up! Especially after he turned his hair yellow. That just seemed to make him even more annoying. I had to ban his friends too since they kept supporting him. Ugh.”

Hero stayed silent, his face turning to a grimace as Mari began asking questions.  
  
“I know Kel is well.. annoying sometimes but he isn’t THAT bad, right? Also, yellow hair? His hair is brown! Are you sure that’s the right person!” She didn’t know if her words were questions or coping, yet she wanted answers.

“Listen, if you see him, my point will be proven. Anyways, feel free to keep browsing. Sorry if I took up any of your time.” The shopkeep dryly laughed as he began cleaning up the countertop. Mari wanted to ask Hero about it, but judging by his face, it definitely wasn’t the best time to ask.

Walking over to the section with the Spaceboy comics in it, she looked at the price tag while Hero watched.

“Wow, you weren’t lying. Why are all of these so expensive?” Mari was bewildered as she stared at the cover. It was issue one, Spaceboy’s dramatic pose as he fired at a group of bunnies was in mint condition, like it had just been printed. Back then, Mari was turned off by this, yet didn’t interfere. Now that Mari was older, her interest only widened and disappointment increased as the things she never experienced were now rarer and rarer.

“Is that all you wanted to look at?” Hero asked, eyeing a few things on the shelves.

“Yes, that was all I wanted to see. Too bad I can’t read this, huh?”

“Yeah… I wish I had a copy to read, but I think the last one was torn up by Hector. Unfortunate.”

Mari got up from the ground and began walking towards the door, Hero following as well. “Come back soon!” the shopkeep said, Mari waving back at him. Hero didn’t look at them, only looking upset.

“So, what next? Should we just go to the park? I’ve seen some weird apple juice stand there, and it’s dirt cheap.” Hero was still figuring out what to do, thinking of what to do as he continued.  
  
“Sure. Beats just standing around it Hobbeez, too.”

“Sounds good! Shouldn’t be too crowded, either.”

Mari began to grin as she walked side by side with Hero. While the day was still very early, it was going much better than her isolation. Mari was still trying to regain her footing with Hero, but the day was still going fine. Still, she wondered where Aubrey, Kel, and Basil were. She was definitely worried, but with Hero to calm her down, she should be fine. Henry was the hook she needed to dig herself out of the hole.

They arrived at the park, and stood at the entrance. “You see that apple juice stand over there? The guy looks pretty hyper, but he’s nice!”  
  
Mari peered over his shoulder as she began looking confused. There was no stand in sight, only some kids grouping up on some other one.

“I don’t think that’s the apple guy, isn’t it? All I see is some kid in a basketball jersey and a long haired kid with a bat. Doesn’t ring a-” Her realization came a few seconds later.

This was who the shopkeeper was talking about. The yellow haired kid with his friends, pestering someone practicing basketball. And when they turned around, Mari’s face was in shock.

That wasn’t any ordinary punk kid.

That was  **_Kel._ **

_ No, no no no no…. There’s no way THAT could be Kel! He looks completely different! Yellow and long hair, wearing this tacky leather jacket, jeans, that could never be Kel!  _ Her wishes were interrupted by the shopkeeper’s tangent playing in her mind.

_ “You were always the nicest to me! Unlike that Kel kid. He’s always so noisy and annoying, he always makes a mess and it takes me ages to clean up! Especially after he turned his hair yellow. That just seemed to make him even more annoying. I had to ban his friends too since they kept supporting him. Ugh.” _

There was no way it could be true. Mari never wanted to believe a kid like Kel could be so… rude. She could only confirm it by investigating further. Hero and Mari both watched from the sidelines as Kel and the other person argued.

“Hey kid, this is Scooter gang territory! That means YOU aren’t allowed!” Kel said, all of his friends laughing behind him. “Scram while you still got the chance, heh.”

“Ok Kel, you can stop acting like you’re the most threatening kid in the town.” the basketball kid said. Instead of acting scared, he looked more annoyed.

Looking closer, Mari noticed he had blonde hair and a messy haircut, but that was all she remembered. Hero wanted to say something, but kept quiet. A few more spectators arrived, mostly staying far away from the gang. The fight continued.

“You think you can mess with the Scooter Gang and get away with it, don’t you? The last people to do that were Adam and Leslie, and you know how they ended up. Nyehehehe.” Kel began brandishing his bat as the rest of the gang began smiling devilishly at the kid.  
  
“That’s because they moved out of town, you dork. Now get outta here. All you’re doing is embarrassing yourself.”  
  
“Huh? You dare mess with our leader, Kel? He’ll have your head!” one said, having brown hair and wearing a basketball jersey. He was always moving around, Mari noticed that. It reminded her of Kel during his orange joe rushes.

“Yeah, our boss is amazing! You won't last 10 seconds against him in a fight!” another said, wearing glasses and a purple hoodie. Mari felt like she had seen them before, yet couldn’t hit the mark.

“Fine! Let him at me! Let’s see if your “leader” can walk instead of just talking.” the kid said, walking onto the grass with a basketball in his hands.

A large “Ooo!” sound came from the people watching, some getting ready to take pictures for personal reasons. Mari wanted to shun those people just watching instead of helping the kid get out of the situation, but Mari felt helpless as well. She had barely managed to exercise consistently, so that bat could probably break her like glass! Hero’s expression showed the same, yet in a different way. Mari couldn’t figure it out and went back to watching.

“Heh, he’s toast!” one in a plaid shirt said to the girl. They all began to grin as Kel also walked up to the area with the basketball kid.

“It’s a fight then! Prepare to be DEMOLISHED BY MY HANDS!” Kel said, in his evil-villain voice. He twirled his hand and brandished his bat as the other kid groaned and got ready.

“3!”  
  
“2!”  
  
“1!”

**“START!”** a blonde haired kid with white clothes said. He quickly backed away as Kel and the other one began circling. 

“Oh, it’s over for you! WATCH THIS, CROWD! TAKE THIS!” Kel triumphantly yelled, a chorus of “Ooh!” and “Aah!” echoing from the crowd. He began charging with his bat, the kids behind Kel grinning like kids on Halloween. Mari felt like this had happened before judging on their reactions. They were confident in their leader, Mari assumed. She could only watch and see.

The fight ended just as fast as it began, a basketball being thrust into Kel’s stomach as he fell to the ground.

“Agh! Why would you DO that, Basil?” Kel said, coughing all the dirt from his mouth and hair.

“Not my fault you tried to be a big bad villain. Now go pester someone else, I'm practicing for the big game.”

The last friend of Kel, a tall one with a purple sweater pulled Kel up and gave him the scooter, as the group began riding away.

“This isn’t the last you’ve heard of me!” Kel yelped, still lurching in pain down the sidewalk as the girl and blonde haired one started helping him.

The people watching were in shock, a few starting to go back to their normal activities. Mari was too, now knowing that basketball kid was none other than Basil. All she knew about Basil is that he absolutely hated sports, wanting to only be left alone with his plants. Now he’s in the middle of a basketball court, shooting hoops. Things really did change.

“S-should I go say hi? And what just happened?” Mari asked Hero, who was staring at Kel as he walked away. He turned around to Mari as he sighed.

“Kel’s been like this for a while, and I have no clue why. It’s just like one day, he’s normal, and the next day, BAM! He’s a lemonhead with a temper!” Mari wanted to laugh, yet knew it was important. Questions flooded her head as she nervously walked to Basil with Hero in front of her. Would Basil still hate her? Would Basil still remember? She could only answer that by talking to him.

“Hey, Basil.” Hero nervously spoke, Mari looking from behind his shoulder. “I think there’s someone who wants to see you.” Basil stopped shooting hoops to look at Henry.

“Oh, uh, hi Henry.” Basil said, his confidence from before starting to evaporate “Why are you here anyways? I thought you were going to college in a few days. Don’t you have to well, prepare?”

“I do, but I have some free time for about 3 days. Besides,  **Mari** is leaving too!” Hero exclaimed. From his tone, it seemed like the two were still friends after all this time. Basil’s face quickly changed to confusion.

“Mari? Now why would I want to see her? She’s been locked up for a few years!” Basil asked, starting to look a bit uncomfortable.

“Oh, she’s right here with me!” Hero said, walking out of the way. Now Mari was in front of Basil, the two staring at eachother like it was a competition. While Mari expected anger and Basil lashing out at her, it was stranger to just see silence.

“...I don’t trust you.” Basil said, starting to go back to his basketball practice. Henry wanted to butt in and say something about how “Mari was fine,” yet knew it wouldn’t do a thing. 

“OK then, that’s fine. See you around, Basil.”  
  
“Sure.”  
  
Hero and Mari began walking away, still trying to figure out what had happened. Mari was still trying to figure out how Kel went from dumb but lovable to a long haired punk, and Basil from a meek gardener to someone who can defend himself. It felt wrong to think about these people like that, but did it really matter? The only person who could hear them was herself.

“Well, I don’t know what else to do today. Maybe we could go find Aubrey? Although, I didn’t see Aubrey at her job today. There’s also just hanging out here, I guess.” Hero said. He had never planned this far ahead, and only thought of things a few minutes before he did it. 

“I know! Maybe we can go to that lake!” Mari spoke with excitement. She knew that lake spot was where they used to hang out all the time. What was worse was when Hero laughed nervously.

“Well, uh… I don’t know if we can do that. They put up some caution tape a few months ago after some kid almost drowned. Or atleast, thats what I think happened. I only heard it from my mom talking on the phone.”

“W-what? I thought the only time that happened was-” Mari did not want to accept the truth. Things really did change, the most important to her being that lake. Like the park, it acted as some sort of sanctuary where she could unwind after a tough day. And apparently, even that was gone. Maybe it was out of curiosity, or not accepting, but she didn’t want to abandon it. Even if it was semi-closed off.

Mari began walking to the small opening in a corner of the park as Hero begrudgingly followed. Through the path they went, moving around some caution tape and traffic cones. A crunch filled each step as the leaves resting on the path were crushed underneath her. A bit of sun broke through the treetops, illuminating the path in front of them.

The path finally found a stop as Mari and Hero reached the lake area. Birds sang their birdsong as she began looking around. Luckily, the place was still as she remembered it. The statue still sat patiently in the small part of land in the middle, the pinwheels they had planted a few years ago still managed to spin like no other, even the spot they used for picnics was spotless! It wasn’t the same, but still usable! A few toys were strewn around, like an incomplete puzzle, but it didn’t matter to Mari.

At least her safe place was fine, and that would be what she wanted.

Across the lake, Henry and Mari noticed someone gardening, planting various flowers of all kinds. She vaguely remembered Basil talking about his flowers, and how they all represented someone. Mari tried to use that knowledge to figure out what they were planting. However, the only flower they could recognize was a white tulip.

The one that represented Sunny.

Looking at the person closer, they had brown, short hair and donned a small flower in their straw hat. A black t-shirt covered by overalls and some boots made her look like Basil 3 years ago. Mari could never pinpoint who they were, yet it was always so.. familiar.

“Oh yeah, that’s Aubrey.” Henry said to Mari. “Other than her clothes and hair, I think she’s still the same as when you last saw her. Try and say hi, maybe.” He pointed towards Aubrey as they started to finish planting the flowers.

She thought for a bit, and decided that she would say hi to Aubrey. She didn’t look like any major trouble had happened to her in 3 years. Only her visual appearance was different, at least Mari thought. Walking around the lake, Hero could only pray and watch

“Hey, Aubrey-” Mari tried to introduce herself, interrupted by Aubrey quickly backing off from Mari. She looked deathly afraid of Mari for some reason, even if Mari was only trying to say hi. She scampered away, only looking at the flowers as she left.

“Huh.” Mari questioned what had just happened, and tried looking at the flowers for answers. The white tulips she knew, they were Sunny’s flowers. The other needed some more thought, however.

She began to remember the flowers and what Basil said about them. The roses came first, as they signalized Hero. Versatile and universally loved, Basil said about him. Mari could agree with that, being one of the closest people to Hero.

The Gladeoli. Gladioli. Gladiolus? The name was confusing, but Mari knew the details. It signaled strength of character, someone who is strong morally and stands by their convictions. Knowing Aubrey, this was the right call.

The cactus. An odd one for sure, but it signified Kel. Basil said it was resilient and can survive in any condition, even allowing someone like Kel to to take care of it. Whether it was a compliment or insult, Mari couldn’t pinpoint it. 

The sunflower. Basil said that they always pointed towards the sun, which always got Mari interested. He always wanted to be on the bright side of things, an optimist at heart. That’s what Basil said signified him, and Mari could agree.

And finally, the white tulip. Always on the middle of things. Not too big or small, not too flashy, not too elaborate or flamboyant, it was modest, simple, and perfect. It was like someone from above blessed Mari, Kel, and everybody else with Sunny in this words. He was the best brother and friend you could ask for.

Yet, a flower seemed to be missing from the group. All 5 flowers were elegantly placed into the ground, facing the statue that sat in the middle of the lake. The breeze slowly swung the flowers back and forth, in the rhythm of the Earth’s heartbeat. 

Mari realized something. This wasn’t just any random flower arrangement built by moms and teenage volunteers. This was something professional, done by gardeners.

It was a  _ memorial. _

She wanted so badly to break down and cry, yet felt like something was stopping her from doing it. Aubrey had made a small formation for Sunny, in memory of what Mari had taken from the group. And she was nowhere to be seen. 

Just like her, Aubrey wanted to forget about Mari. Mari had taken away Sunny from this world, and everybody in the group knew the truth. She was a horrible sister to Sunny, Horrible. Mari knew this fact and couldn’t let herself cry over it. Why pity herself over the crime she commited, instead of apologizing to those she had wronged? It was horrible.  _ Mari _ was horrible.

She went over to the bench and put her head in her hands. A million thoughts and scenarios ran through her head like runners in a 100 meter race. Did Aubrey really not care about her? Did Kel and Basil care about her?  
  
Did Hero even care, or was it just to make her feel better? Hero only started knocking a few weeks ago, only after seeing the “SOLD” sign on the lawn. Mari hoped for a better solution than what she thought of in her head, yet it felt like the flowers stopped her from realizing that.

She looked up from the ground, and it was only silence. The wind stopped blowing. The birds stopped chirping. 

And the monster was there, standing a few feet in front of her. Mari was shocked, and wanted to try and run away. Her legs would not follow her thoughts however, and started walking closer and closer to it.

No! This was the OPPOSITE of what she wanted to do! Mari tried her best to resist, yet kept walking forwards. The monster stood there, only staring at her as she advanced.

Now, Mari was face to face with it. Her fears wanted to let out every single feeling bubbling in her gut, but something else calmed her down. For some odd reason, she felt something she had not felt in a long time.

Bliss. 

Despite the monster looking like a deformed mess, it made her feel safe. The IV drip bag supplying it began to fizzle away.  
  
“wHEn wILL yOu FoRGIVe yOURseLF, maRi?” it asked. Mari looked at the monster, and began to speak. She was ready to-  
  
“MARI!” Henry shouted, right next to her on the bench. “What are you doing? You’ve been like that for an hour and i’ve been trying to get your attention this whole time!”

She grounded herself back into reality and looked around. The monster was gone. The breeze was back. The birds were singing. This was no dream.

“Oh, I must’ve zoned out for a bit.” Mari exclaimed, dusting herself off from the bench. “We should probably go somewhere else.”

“Why are you just, shrugging this off like this is normal? One hour daydream sessions don’t happen a lot, hell, maybe at all. What happened in those 3 years?” Hero wanted to ask more questions, yet Mari shrugged them off and started walking to the passage.  
  
“...other than that, what now? There’s not much we can do other than go visit the shops or hang out at Hobbeez. Not the most fun thing to do.” Hero rubbed the back of his neck, trying to think of things to do. Mari was just as confused, not wanting to retreat back into her home once again. She enjoyed the company from others, and did not want to let go. It was too bad that she only had Hero, however. Kel, Aubrey and Basil being there would complete it for her.

The past was in the past though, and she knew changing things would most likely never happen. As long as she had Hero, it would be ok. At least for now.

Eventually, Hero and Mari decided that they would try and find Kel. Hero had said that Kel would always run off to some place, and Hero wanted to solve it. His first hint was somewhere near church, as it had a small area at the side where she sometimes saw kids play. There was nothing there, yet their imagination seemed to do the talking. Perfect for Sunny.

The only sounds were the wind and the sounds of Mari and Hero walking along

concrete. Mari only thought about Kel for the time being. How did Kel go from such a cheery young boy to…. that? A cocky, full-of-himself kid with all of his goons supporting it. How did it all happen in 3 years?

Mari and Hero turned the corner, and surprisingly, there was a small opening that led into a small group of trees. Being curious as always, they both followed the path.

  
  
  
  
  


“Hey Kel, why did you even decide to grow your hair out this long anyways?” Kim asked, brushing each strand of Kel’s hair with a brush. “I know you’ve had short hair before, I saw you a few years ago. Why make the change now?”

“Hey, as a former short-hair enthusiast, it makes me look cooler in my opinion.” Kel said, grinning like a madman. “You should try it someday, too!” He was still brushing dirt off of his clothes, but still looked fine.

“Listen, I know you’re a goofball and all that, but why bright yellow hair too? It just makes you stand out, and not in a good way.  _ Even if your hair feels good-” _

“Huh?” Kel turned around, looking at Kim.

“Nothing, nothing!” Kim quickly responded, turning redder than a pair of cherries. Kim continued brushing strands of Kel’s long, bright-yellow hair. Despite sticking out like a sore thumb from far away, feeling it was like touching silk. Kel was a doofus all the time, always getting himself into trouble, yet he was like what he was a few years ago. Joyful. Energetic.

All things Kim liked in a person.

Despite all of his flaws, and how people generally saw Kel, Kim enjoyed her time. Each strand of hair was full of knots and weird things, generally surprised at how Kel could do this with long hair. It was so easy to not have that many knots in hair, yet Kel seemed to break the records. Not like she didn’t want to… but..

“Hey Kim, I wonder what would happen if my hair was longer than this! What if it was down to my spine? That’d be cool! Really cool!” Kel exclaimed, bursting with energy from the idea.

“Yeah, cool idea, but stay still for me, please.” she responded, carefully taking out another knot in Kel’s hair. “I don’t wanna accidentally hurt you, you know.”

“Oh, alright.” Kel calmed down and stayed deathly still for Kim. She sighed as the last strands of Kel’s hair were being brushed. A few seconds had passed and the sounds of nature were overtaking the sounds. Chirps of birds. Rustles in the bushes. Bugs fluttering around the bushes. Kim liked nature sounds sometimes, but not right now.

“Actually, keep talking. I think it’s cute when you do that.” Kim said, blushing as she spat out the words.

Kel blushed back, turning pink. “Well, okay then! I’ll get to it!” A big grin formed on Kel’s face as he began to start talking about things. Unfortunately, he could only talk for a good 30 seconds before Hero and Mari had arrived, staring at Kel and Kim. Kim only stared while Kel began talking.

“H-Hero? What are you doing here?” Kel asked, blushing harder than Kim was earlier. “What do you want? I am NOT telling you about my Orange Joe stash!”  
  
“Orange Joe stash? What?” Hero questioned, putting his finger up to his chin.  
  
“Y-you heard nothing! Kim, let’s get out of here!” Kel said, getting up from the stump and began walking out of the clearing.

“Wait, Kel! I have someone to show to you.” Hero shuffled out of the way, leaving Mari in full view. She stood there awkwardly as the mood shifted.

“K-Kel? That’s the girl you were talking to me about earlier, right?” Kim said, pointing at Mari. He turned around, bright yellow strands of hair spinning in the breeze. 

The area went silent, Kel locking eyes with Mari. Slowly, his face went from flustered to angry. His fists were clenched and it felt like steam was blowing out of his ears. At least to Mari. Unlike Kel, Mari held a concerned face. She was clueless to the whole situation, only wanting to say hi.

“Hi, Kel-”  
  
“GET OUT OF HERE, MARI!” Kel yelled, the calm demeanor Mari remembered him for falling at the seams. “YOU SHOULDN’T EVEN BE HERE!” He was red as a tomato, in face and in skin.

“Kel, calm down. I just wanted to say hi-” Mari wanted to say something to try and make things right, but Kel interrupted her.

“You’re the one who made me like this! All because HERO kept swooning for your attention like a dog! And I LIKE dogs!”

“Kel, now’s not the time for this kind of stuff-”    
  


“You’re not allowed to say that! You always spout about Mari and cry about her EVERY. SINGLE. DAY! I can hear it when i'm trying to sleep!”

That got Hero to quiet down as Kel continued.

“Ever since Sunny died, you’ve always been so stagnant. Mari was so shut-in from all of us, and you never seemed to give up. You’d always be crying about her every day of the week, and mom was always there for you. Where was it for ME, when you started outbursting at me after I wanted to spend time with you? Mom and dad got to hug you, and went back to whatever they were doing.”  
  
“Kel, stop acting like a child, this just seems unreasonable.” Mari tried to speak and reason with Kel, and he wouldn’t let up.

“Words STICK, Mari. Like superglue. Remember those words from Basil 3 years ago? I still remember them. Why do YOU act like a child and hide instead of facing reality? I had to face it full force while you got to be in your comfy little home!”

“Kel, just let me apologize, please…” Hero said, tears welling up in his eyes. “You don’t need to keep acting like this, you know..”  
  
“WHY DO YOU ONLY APOLOGIZE NOW? SO YOU CAN SEEM LIKE THE BIGGER MAN TO MARI?” Kel shouted, fueled with anger. “WHY DIDN’T YOU APOLOGIZE WHEN YOU STARTED SCREAMING AT ME? WHY DIDN’T YOU APOLOGIZE WHEN YOU ALMOST TOOK ME AWAY FROM MY FRIENDS? WHY DIDN’T YOU APOLOGIZE FOR ALL THE NEGLECT YOU PUT ME THROUGH? HUH?”  
  
The forest went quiet. Mari had a face of… disbelief. She had tears welled up in her eyes, starting to water the dirt beneath her with the tears. Hero was the same as Mari, mostly in shock at what Kel said. He looked at his feet to avoid eye contact with Kel. Kim stayed silent, walking over to Kel to try and avoid conflict. Kel broke the silence.

“Come on, Kim, Let’s get out of here. I don’t want to see them.” he mumbled, turning away from the two and walking away. Kim followed, brush in hand.

Mari turned to Hero, wiping the tears out of her eyes.

“What just happened, Hero?” she sniffled, trying to croak out words. “Why was he so.. angry? What did you do?”

Hero couldn’t answer Mari’s question. He kept looking at the floor, trying to ignore Mari’s presence. Unlike his calm and confident stride earlier with a bit of confusion earlier in the day, he was now looking like he was speechless. Hero tried to stare at Mari, yet couldn’t muster up the confidence to do so.

“Meet me at the graveyard tomorrow morning. I’ll tell you then.” he mumbled, walking off out of the forest clearing. And now, it was only her left. Mari took a seat onto the stump, trying to make sense of today. Everyone was so… different from 3 years ago. Basil now being a confident, strong and social person, Aubrey becoming a gardener and being afraid of Mari, and then there was Kel.  
  
Kel seemed damaged. So did Hero. Watching Kel lash out at the both of them reminded them of Basil’s out lash at Mari. The stories were similar too, both being about neglect from two people. The reminder made Mari sad, knowing that both of them could’ve been prevented with just a bit more communication. 

Yet, in some way, Mari started to feel… calm. Seeing so many people upset at something she was also upset about made Mari feel like someone was there, to share the same feelings. Of course, the circumstances were both different. One was just a normal person affected by grief, and another is a failure of a sister coping with her need for perfection failing her after a brash decision. Different things, but they could still share the same feelings about it. It was like pseudo-therapy, but with someone she knew and cared about. It felt… good.

Maybe the therapist was right. Maybe she was a bit messed up. What Mari thought was basically admitting she liked seeing her friends sad as a coping mechanism. Was that even healthy? She remembered the talks about “healthy coping mechanisms” and started to think. 

A lot of them felt like they had a similar theme, being about trying to find something to take your mind off of the emotions you were feeling. Maybe the ones she had gotten were not ones for loss. She didn’t know. Venting to her friends was always something she liked to do, yet it felt like they were only there to listen. Did they actually care about what she felt?  
  
With something like shared grief, Mari could have someone who understood what she felt. And if they wanted to talk too, she’d be there for them. It was like a messed-up symbiotic relationship, between Mari and someone like Hero. Mari didn't knew whether it was morally correct or not, but does that matter for coping? Maybe, maybe not, but she focused on the big details first.

  
At this point, Mari was tired after arguing with herself for a few hours. All the events of today and then the debate in her mind about coping, she wanted to go to sleep. Besides, Mari would be able to meet up with Hero tomorrow. Maybe she could obtain more info there. In the meantime, Mari was going to go to sleep. She could reflect on what happened with her dream friends, so it was a win for everyone. Exiting the forest area, Mari made her way home. Something seemed to follow close behind.

  
  
  


Mari was now in bed, wearing her pajamas and staring at the ceiling as the stars began to rise up into the sky. It had been a long day, and a good night's sleep was what she needed. Mari began thinking about all the revelations made today. Everyone had changed in one way or another, shaking up the dynamic in her dreams that Mari remembered them for. Mari was willing for change, yet to her friend group? It was something un-answerable for her as of now. Maybe tomorrow would be a better day.

Mari closed her eyes.

  
  
  


**_Welcome to White Space. You’ve been here for as long as you can remember._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BALLIN BASIL
> 
> its 2:26 am if you find any grammatical errors tell me so I can fix them


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